Illegal Procedure

About Tim Tebow - An Open Letter to John Elway

2011-11-18T17:30:00.001-05:00

Denver Broncos Football Club - Executive Offices
Attn: John Elway - EVP of Football Operations
13655 Broncos Parkway
Englewood, CO 80112

Mr. Elway,

I have been watching football since I was old enough to turn the channel on the television. I became a fan of the University of Florida when I began attending classes there in 1981. You are now discovering what we in the Gator Nation already know; Tim Tebow is not just a football player, he is a phenomenon.

He is a young man who refuses to compromise in an age when everything is negotiable. He wants to help make the world a better place in an age when people have a hard time believing anyone could really want such a thing. He is as competitive as any athlete that ever set foot on a playing field, but he still wants you to realize there is more to life than just winning games. If there are Tebow haters out there, it is not because they don’t want to be constantly reminded of what he is, but because they don’t want to be constantly reminded of what they aren’t.

He may not have a pretty throwing motion or a quick release like some of the NFL greats to whom has been compared, but he is the best I have ever seen at making the people around him better. On the field. And off.

That, Mr. Elway, makes him worth his weight in gold.

While Tim Tebow is the ultimate team player, he will not allow himself to be outworked by anyone. Your desire to see him continue to improve his ability to compete at the professional level does not and will not – ever - exceed his own desire to do so. I do not mean to imply that I have anywhere near the amount of football knowledge that you have, but I can assure you, as a Gator fan, I have watched Tim Tebow play more than you have. If I were in your position, I would not try to make him into what I want him to be. I would encourage him to continue being what he is. You, your organization, and its fans will be better as a result.

Cordially,

Brian R. Walker

Comments on Bowls, Part III

2011-01-02T10:54:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was a fantastic day. For two reasons.

First, I went 5-1 in bowl picks, bringing my overall record to 11-8. I am better than a coin toss (at least for now)!

Secondly, it was, in the words of ESPN analyst Kirk Hirbstreit, "the worst January bowl day in the history of the Big 10." The Big 10 (Plus 1, Soon to Add Another) lost all five of their bowl games yesterday. The only regret I have is picking Michigan to beat Mississippi State. What was I thinking? I was only off by 38 points (the Bulldogs won 52-14).

Of course, I was happy to see the Gators manage a win over Penn State to send Urban Meyer out on a positive note. His impact on the Florida program, and college football in general, can not be overstated.

And you have to admire someone who is leaving the game to focus on his family and his health. This is a man who has his priorities straight. Even if it took him a year to be sure.

Seven games left in bowl season. A chance for me to go 18-8! Yeah, right.

Comments on Bowls, Part II

2011-01-01T10:41:00.000-05:00

I am currently 6-7 in bowl picks, but I could make up a lot of ground today, right?

Bowl season is fascinating. It's GREAT for college football (one day I will write that lengthy article on bowls/BCS vs playoff that I've been promising) and it never ceases to be surprising, confounding and entertaining.

Motivation plays such a huge part. Did you see the two teams that absolutely failed to show up yesterday? Georgia and Clemson both had a chance to avoid a losing season. And both of them stunk. You will never convince me that UCF is better than Georgia. But they sure wanted the Liberty Bowl to be the first bowl win ever for their program. And Georgia sure wanted to be... partying on Beale Street, apparently.

Clemson, meanwhile - bear in mind this is the team that lost at Auburn by just a field goal in overtime - played uninspired defense, and made South Florida's B.J. Daniels look like Fran Tarkenton.

Miami and South Carolina did too much to help their opponents win. The Gamecocks had five turnovers against Florida State, including turnovers on their first three possessions in the opening half. Miami had four turnovers against Notre Dame. That, combined with boneheaded and untimely penalties doomed the Canes. New coach Al Golden had his work cut out for him.

The good news is I have burgers and beer ready for my New Year's Day viewing - six games that will take me from noon until midnight in a blaze of blitzes and bootlegs.

I'll drink to that.

Comments on Bowls, Part I

2010-12-31T11:39:00.002-05:00

We are nine games into my bowl picks, and I am 4-5 in those games. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it appears as if I would be better off flipping a coin.

But let's consider a few factors and mitigating circumstances. Missouri is just snakebitten. Blaine Gabbert plays the game of his life - 41 of 57 passing for 434 yards - but throws a pick 6 late in the game that turns out to be the difference. And the allegedly much-improved Tiger defense couldn't stop Iowa's running game. Mind you, Missouri is the team that fell victim to the "5th Down" play in 1990 against Colorado, with the Buffs going on to win a share of the national championship. Missouri just can't seem to win a big game, sometimes through no fault of their own.

Speaking of winning big games, I should have known that the Fighting Zookers would play well in a relatively meaningless bowl. They can't win the big game either, but they somehow win the ones you would think wouldn't inspire them. This is a team that lost to Minnesota for crying out loud. I should have known they would plow Baylor.

The biggest surprise was SMU not showing up for three quarters of the game in their home stadium against a pretty average Army team. As I noted in my predictions, I was afraid to pick against Army in the Armed Forces Bowl. Never again. Army played their asses off, and came away with a win. I love watching the service academies play. They never put more raw talent on the field than their opponents. They play assignment football, and they play with discipline. As an example, in the game against SMU, Army had no penalties and no turnovers. That is amazing.

I would like to point out that the excessive celebration penalty that probably cost Kansas State the game against Syracuse was complete garbage. As a referee, you CAN NOT make a borderline call like that on a play that may very well decide the outcome of the game. Terrible. Horrible. Shameful.

Lastly, congratulations to the Washington Huskies. If I were picking against the spread, as I did elsewhere, I would have taken Washington. I knew they would play way better than they did back in September, but I still didn't think they could win outright. Nebraska had very little to play for, and they played like it. It's always nice to see Nebraska lose, except when they screw up my bowl picks.

We have a full slate of games in the next couple of days - still time for me to make up some of the ground I lost in the first few... Enjoy!

Bowl Mania

2010-12-27T20:33:00.002-05:00

A brief look at the remaining bowls...

West Virginia vs NC State
Mountaineers have a few key starters out, including their center (academics) and a cornerback (torn ACL). Also, their coaching situation is now officially absurd.

My Pick – NC State

Missouri vs Iowa
Missouri won its last 3, Iowa lost its last 3. Iowa’s leading WR arrested on Dec 7 on drug charges, and a top RB was dismissed for violating team policies. In short, Iowa has been going in the crapper while Missouri has recovered from the 2 game road losing streak that kept them out of the Big 12 championship game.

My Pick – Missouri

Maryland vs East Carolina
This is really, really tough. Maryland’s coaching situation is also officially absurd. But East Carolina has the worst defense in the country. Literally. They are 120th in total defense, out of 120 teams in the FBS. And they lost 4 of their last 5. But, in those losses, they scored 35, 35, 38 and 38. They can score. Problem is they can’t stop anybody. I’m hoping the Maryland kids will want to send the Fridge out on a winning note.

My Pick – Maryland

Baylor vs Illinois
Illinois lost 3 of their last 4. Baylor lost their last 3. So, neither team is on a roll, so to speak, and neither team actually beat anybody good. Baylor hasn’t been to a bowl game since 1994. Are they just happy to be back in a bowl game? Or will they fight hard to end the season on a high note? The game is in Houston, which may be a slight edge for Baylor, but this is a toss of the coin. When in doubt, bet against any team coached by Ron Zook.

My Pick – Baylor

Oklahoma State vs Arizona
Mike Stoops looks funny to me. I can never get past that fact when I watch Arizona. QB Nick Foles has some impressive numbers, but does boneheaded things at times. I think this game may be one of those times. Arizona lost their last 4 games. Oklahoma State leads the nation in total offense, and they are 3rd in scoring offense. I just don’t think Arizona can keep up.

My Pick – Oklahoma State

SMU vs Army
I hate to pick against Army in the Armed Forces Bowl. I’m sure they’ll be pumped – it’s their first bowl in 14 years. Army is 120th in the nation in passing offense. Dead last. I just don’t see them keeping up with SMU. And the game will be played on SMU’s home field (since the usual site of the game in Ft. Worth in under renovation).

My Pick – SMU

Kansas State vs Syracuse
These are two evenly matched mediocre teams. When in doubt, bet against a 7-5 team from the Big (L)East when playing a 7-5 team from the Big 12 – even if the game is in the Big Apple (250 miles away from Syracuse). Syracuse has a DT and LB suspended for violating team rules.

My Pick – Kansas State

North Carolina vs Tennessee
This is another game that is a toss up. North Carolina has to be happy to NOT be playing in the Meineke Bowl in Charlotte – where they have been for their last 3 bowls. The Vols are pumped for this game – it is sold out, and close to home for them, but here’s the one key stat that stands out – North Carolina plays well in hostile environments, going 4-1 in road games (3-4 at home).

My Pick – North Carolina

Nebraska vs Washington
Nebraska has to be disappointed after blowing a 17-0 lead and losing to Oklahoma in the Big 12 championship game, thus missing out on a BCS bowl. Nebraska is clearly the better team, but all they have to play for is “a chance to win their 11th game,” according to head coach Bo Pelini. Washington will be eager to show that they are better than they appeared when they lost 56-21 to Nebraska at home in September.

My Pick – Nebraska

Clemson vs South Florida
Something tells me that Clemson is a just a tiny bit better. I’m not sure why. Neither team will light up the scoreboard – Clemson is 86th in the nation in scoring, South Florida is 88th.

My Pick – Clemson

Miami vs Notre Dame
The worst part about this game is that one of these teams has to win. I hate them both. Notre Dame comes in on a 3 game winning streak. Miami lost their last 2 games. Then fired their coach. I’m hoping for compound fractures and an uninspired performance from the Canes.

My Pick – Notre Dame

Georgia vs Central Florida
Both of these teams are annoying. Georgia is annoying just because they are Georgia. Central Florida seems to think they belong in a real league. They have a good defense, but I’d like to believe they can’t compete with a middle of the road team from the SEC, even when it’s the stinking Dawgs.

My Pick – Georgia

South Carolina vs Florida State
I can’t explain it, all I know is this is exactly the kind of game that Florida State wins. One key thing – they are 2nd in the nation in sacks, and they will terrorize Gamecock QB Stephen Garcia.

My Pick – Florida State

Texas Tech vs Northwestern
Northwestern started 5-0, then lost 5 of their last 7. I expect a shootout, and Texas Tech should run away with it. By the way, Northwestern hasn’t won a bowl game since 1949.

My Pick – Texas Tech

Florida vs Penn State
I don’t see either of these teams scoring many points. I assume Florida’s defense will play some inspired ball trying to send Urban Meyer out with a win. I think Florida wins, barely.

My Pick – Florida

Alabama vs Michigan State
Michigan State finished 11-1 against the 34th toughest schedule. Alabama finished 9-3 against the 9th toughest schedule. Which result is more impressive? I think Alabama is superior, but it depends which Bama team shows up (see the loss to Utah in 2009 Sugar Bowl). The good news is the new artificial surface at the Citrus Bowl won’t turn into the quagmire that negated the superior speed of the SEC teams last year. The Spartans leading receiver broke his foot on Dec 18. I think Alabama wins a close one.

My Pick – Alabama

Michigan vs Mississippi State
Are the Wolverines playing to save RichRod’s job? Michigan has a potent offense, but they can’t stop the run. Can they beat Mississippi State in a shootout? I think so.

My Pick – Michigan

TCU vs Wisconsin
I hate Wisconsin. They are guaranteed to lose at least one big game every year. And they run up the score against weaklings. TCU is known as a defensive team – 1st in the nation in scoring defense, total defense and pass efficiency defense. Guess what. They are also 9th in the nation in total offense, 4th in scoring offense. Wisconsin will find out what it’s like to play a complete team.

My Pick – TCU

Oklahoma vs UConn
Wouldn’t you love to see UConn upset Oklahoma? Me too. It’s not going to happen.

My Pick – Oklahoma

Stanford vs Virginia Tech
I think Stanford is a complete team, and a more physical team than Virginia Tech.

My Pick - Stanford

Ohio State vs Arkansas
Ohio State has never beaten an SEC team in a bowl game. Ever. They are 0-9. And now a bunch of them are going to try to pretend they didn’t know they couldn’t sell their Big 10 championship rings. Scumbags galore on that team. The stinking Buckeyes think they can run all day and keep the Arkansas offense off the field. Good luck. Ryan Mallett will pass for 300 yards.

My Pick - Arkansas

Miami (Oh) vs Middle Tennessee
Middle Tennessee won their last 3 games to finish bowl eligible at 6-6. Miami completed a huge turnaround, going 9-4 after finishing 1-11 last year. Their reward? Head coach Mike Haywood got hired away to Pittsburgh. Can they still win this game? Yes.

My Pick - Miami (Oh)

LSU vs Texas A&M
Texas A&M started the season 3-3, then changed QB’s and won their last 6. But this will be the best defense they’ve seen all season. And Les Miles may be the luckiest head coach on the planet.

My Pick - LSU

Pittsburgh vs Kentucky
Kentucky QB Mike Hartline is suspended after a DUI arrest. Pittsburgh’s head coach got canned. Both of these teams may just go through the motions. When in doubt, go with the SEC team.

My pick - Kentucky

Nevada vs Boston College
Boston College has the nation’s top run defense. Nevada has the nation’s 3rd best rushing offense. Something has to give. I don’t think BC can keep up with Nevada.

My Pick - Nevada

Auburn vs Oregon
In my opinion, (S)Cam Newton is a blivit (10 pounds of crap in a five pound bag). He’s also an amazing QB. Here’s some interesting stats I stole. Oregon has given up more than 500 yards of offense in 3 games. That does not bode well. Auburn played 5 games against teams ranked 18th or higher. Oregon played 1. I think this title will be stripped from Auburn in 2 years, but they are going to win it.

My Pick - Auburn

Where Do I Start? (or Restart?)

2010-12-27T19:40:00.000-05:00

I'm perfectly ready to admit that I have fallen down on the job. I mean, how can I not admit it? It's been two months since I passed along my valuable wisdom and insight to my formerly dedicated readers.

Ok, Ok, I'm a loser, dammit. I could expect you to understand that I started a new job (you know, one that actually pays the bills, unlike this thankless endeavor), and the adjustment has taken my body and my brain a while. Plus, I've been fighting the sinus infection from hell. When the weather cools, I can't frolic at the beach as much. I'm discovering that dunks in the ocean are important to my nasal health. The ocean is, after all, the world's biggest neti pot.

But, if I may paraphrase General MacArthur, I'm back! And just in time for bowl season. Or some it it. I have some bowl picks to share.

I also have some thoughts on some other recent (or not so recent any more) developments in college football.

So buckle up your chinstraps, and let's get ready for a strong finish...

My Crystal Ball Says... (Week 9)

2010-10-30T15:48:00.000-04:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

Week 9

Ok, ok, I know. I am lame. I haven't put My Crystal Ball to work in a couple of weeks. First of all, I was a little disturbed when my picks - based on decades of watching and writing about college football - were outdone by the tossing of a coin. Secondly, I've been getting my ass kicked lately by life in general, and work in particular. If any of you can hook me up with a sponsor that has deeper pockets than my current one, I will gladly abandon my regular working life and dedicate myself to My Crystal Ball full time, provided I can still afford cheap beer and expensive champagne.

This week, I'm going to kick the quarter's ass.

#2 Oregon at USC - This is a popular upset pick this week. NCAA sanctions will prevent USC from playing in a bowl game, and, apparently, they are treating this game like the Big Game. So, for some reason, the alleged experts think the Trojans can pull this off. At first glimpse, it appears that Oregon has a clear advantage. They are unbeaten (7-0). Their offense has been running like a sports car, smooth and fast, and their defense has been surprisingly tough. But, even though USC is 5-2, the losses have been by a combined total of three points, both on last second field goals. The Trojan defense has struggled, but should play well at home in a game like this. I hate USC. They cheated, got caught, and are now mad about it. Hey, choices have consequences. It's called life. Deal with it. And if you think Reggie Bush was the only player getting paid to play, contact me immediately; I have some oceanfront property in Kansas that I will sell you cheap. But at least they made things better after Pete Carroll abandoned the floundering ship by hiring Lane Kiffin, who has habitually thumbed his nose at the NCAA, and everybody else for that matter. This despite the fact that his career record as a head coach is currently 17-23. I've said it before, and I'll say it again; if anybody wants to pay me $3 million a year to be an idiot, I will gladly sign your contract. And I promise to give you the most idiot your money can buy. I would love to see an upset here, partly because I just like upsets (except when they happen to my team), and partly because I want Boise State to get a spot in the BCS Championship game. But I think the Ducks have too much depth, and will pull away late. And Lane Kiffin will be 17-24. *chuckles*

Quarter says: Oregon

#5 Michigan State at #18 Iowa - It's hard to appreciate the style of football they play in a league that still isn't sure how many members it has. I finally understand why they have so many noon kickoffs in the Big Ten Plus One Soon to be Twelve - who could stay awake late at night watching this stuff? Iowa is starting to remind me of Wisconsin - you can always count on them for a key conference win and a key conference loss. It must be painfully tantalizing for their fans. No wonder they whine so much. Iowa (5-2) is coming off a close home loss to Wisconsin, but they are solid, if not spectacular, on both sides of the ball. Michigan State comes into this game unbeaten (8-0) and under pressure. They've beaten some teams that are decent, at least on paper, but their most notable accomplishment so far seems to be beating Notre Dame on a trick play that was so exciting the coach who called it subsequently had a heart attack. I'm happy that Mark Dantonio has recovered, and has returned to the sidelines. But I'm hoping that Saturday's game doesn't send him back to the emergency room. Michigan State has lost six straight at Iowa, dating back to 1991. The Hawkeyes will see that the streak runs to seven.

Quarter says: Michigan State

#1 Auburn at Mississippi - This is another popular upset pick among the alleged experts. Rebel coach Houston Nutt does have a pretty remarkable record in upset victories - knocking off #1 teams on the road in 2008 (Florida) and 2007 (LSU), and beating #2 Auburn in 2006 (while the head coach at Arkansas). But Mississippi (3-4) has never beaten Auburn (8-0) when the Tigers are ranked (0-13). And Cam Newton has started to look like a man among boys. Right now, it's his Heisman to lose, and I don't see him losing it in Oxford. If Auburn keeps winning - and I think they will - it sets up a huge Iron Bowl at Alabama on November 26th.

Quarter says: Auburn

Florida vs Georgia (Jacksonville) - I have to be honest. It's hard to care about this game. Both teams had high expectations, and both teams have been, basically, terrible. Georgia has been improving since receiver A.J. Green returned from suspension - they've won three in a row. Florida, on the other hand, comes in with a three game losing streak, and with an offense that spends as much time standing still - or going backwards - as it does doing anything positive at all. While Georgia spent last week struggling with Kentucky, Florida had an off week to try to figure out how to move the ball. The Gator defense has been porous at times, but is playing better than expected most of the time. I think the Florida players and coaches need this win desperately. And, somehow, I think they'll get it.

Quarter says: Georgia

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Stanford Not Just for Nerds Any More

2010-10-14T23:02:00.011-04:00

Stanford coach Jim Harbaugh has the Tree playing a physical style of football that is fun to watch. It takes tough guys to play that way, and Stanford has a few.

Quarterback Andrew Luck is a big guy with a strong arm. And, as he shows in the video clip below, he is tough. For a quarterback...

Upon Further Review (Week 5)

2010-10-05T23:06:00.009-04:00

Illegal Procedure Exclusive Photo: The Zooker Does It Again

This was a familiar sight to Florida fans from 2002 to the middle of 2004. Since then, it has become a familiar sight to Illinois fans. In this photo - an Illegal Procedure exclusive - the rest of you get to know Ron Zook as Florida and Illinois fans know him. He has spent years trying - and failing - to coach his way out of a paper bag.

Let's look at the latest example from this past Saturday.

Ohio State paid a visit to Champaign, and the Illinois struggled mightily to keep the game close. Trailing 17-10 in the middle of the 4th quarter, the Illini pieced together a drive that left them at the Buckeyes' 13 yard line with under five minutes to play. Illinois had burned a time out on defense during Ohio State's previous possession, so they had two left. It's 4th and 7.

If you have a normal, functioning brain, you would think to yourself, Ohio State chewed up almost 8 minutes on their last possession - which led to a field goal. Even though I have two time outs, I may not get the ball back. I need to go for it on 4th down. I need a touchdown here. A field goal does me no good. Even if the field goal is good, I still need a touchdown to win.

But Ron Zook, apparently, does not have a normal, functioning brain. He decided to kick a field goal to make it 17-13. Ron, think about this, after that field goal you kicked, you still needed a touchdown. Why not go for it on 4th down? Did you really think you could get a field goal and a touchdown on your last two possessions if, indeed you actually got another possession? And despite the fact that you had managed 10 points in the previous 55 minutes of the game, you thought you were going to score another 10 in the last 5 minutes?

Thankfully for fans of the Zooker, he was saved from Bonehead of the Week status by the actions of Legendary Bonehead Les Miles...

Bonehead of the Week

How many times can Les Miles reach into his bag of lucky tricks and pull out a win? Seriously. Saturday's last second tragically comic ending in the game against Tennessee would probably earn him Bonehead of the Year honors, if we had such a thing.

Trailing 14-10, LSU miraculously drove 69 yards for the winning score, along the way converting a 4th and 14 that should have been a 4th and 9, except for poor clock management that caused a delay of game penalty. Slow play-calling and substitution had caused LSU to burn the last of their timeouts just a moment before. But the preposterously stupid part came at the very end.

With a 2nd and goal at the Tennessee 2 yard line, and time running out, Tiger quarterback Jordan Jefferson scrambled for a yard to the Volunteer 1. With the clock running down to single digits, LSU, inexplicably, decided to change personnel before running the next play. There was no way it was going to work, and, in fact, it didn't. LSU center T Bob Hebert, seeing the clock ticking down near zero, snapped the ball before Jefferson was expecting it. The snap went behind him, and all Jefferson could do was run and fall on it.

Game over.

Except it wasn't.

The only thing more unbelievable than LSU changing personnel with the clock inside of 10 seconds and running was the fact that Tennessee tried to substitute to match LSU's line up. As LSU snapped the ball on what should have been the last, hopeless play of the game, Tennessee had 13 men on the field.

Penalty. Illegal participation.

LSU was allowed to repeat the last play, with no time on the clock, and the result of that play was a Stevan Ridley 1 yard run for the winning score. Final: LSU 16 - Tennessee 14.

What would possibly make anyone think that situation substitution would be a good idea with 9 seconds on the clock and no time outs?

Amazingly, Les Miles thought so. And got away with it.

But he is still the Bonehead of the Week.

Addazio Calling Plays for the Wrong QB

I am still ready and willing to say that Alabama is the best team in the country right now, so let's make no mistake about that. But if you look back at Saturday's win over Florida, it wasn't the colossal beatdown that most of the alleged experts would lead you to believe.

First of all, Florida has been a slow-starting team all year, and Alabama is certainly good enough to take advantage of that. The Gators outgained the Tide by a 2 to 1 margin in the second half. Sure, by then, Alabama had a comfortable lead, but, if you're going to tell me that Nick Saban called off the dogs early then you don't know much about Nick Saban.

Secondly - and I know there isn't much sense in using your imagination to retroactively remove certain plays from a game, but let's think about this - if Florida manages to score touchdowns both times they moved the ball inside the Alabama two yard line and came away empty, and, if they don't throw the pick 6 in the 3rd quarter, then you're looking at a 24-20 game. Still a Florida loss, but not exactly a behind the woodshed whipping.

Thirdly, the Gator defense is good enough to keep them in a game with anybody. When the Florida coaching staff finally realizes that what they have is a drop-back passing quarterback and not a spread option quarterback, and begins calling plays accordingly, they will become significantly more effective.

Florida offensive coordinator Steve Addazio has shown absolutely no ability to establish a tempo or rhythm with his playcalling, and help his new starting quarterback get into the flow of a game. He calls plays as if he has written them on little cut up strips of paper that he then pulls out of a hat during the game.

That little inside hand-off dive play that he likes so much...? Never going to work when there is no credible threat that the quarterback might actually pull that ball out and run around the end with it. Especially if the offensive line is having trouble moving anybody off the line of scrimmage (by the way, Addazio is also the offensive line coach). Having John Brantley run the option sweep to the short side of the field, deep in your own end of the field on second and ten? You must be joking.

Here is my suggestion: immediately remove from the game plan any play that involves John Brantley carrying the ball by design. With all due respect to Brantley, that is not his forte. Opposing defenses pray for that kind of wasted effort, and that kind of opportunity. Why take a chance on getting your most experienced and potentially most-effective quarterback hurt?

During the telecast of Saturday's game, CBS commentator Gary Danielson said it best, "They're calling plays for the wrong quarterback."

I'll go a little further. The playcalling stinks and the offensive line has under-performed. Both of those areas are the direct responsibility of Steve Addazio. I don't care if he ran the ship during Urban Meyer's leave of absence. I don't care if he has stood in for the Pope himself. Florida's two biggest weaknesses right now are his responsibility.

My Crystal Ball Says...

2010-10-02T16:26:00.002-04:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

Week 5

I decided to try an experiment this week. I am going to see how my picks compare with tossing a coin to select the winner.

I would like to think that my experience, my years of watching college football - both in person and on the tube - and my zillions of hours spent reading the self-serving drivel of alleged experts would help me be at least somewhat more accurate than a coin flip.

Let's find out...

#7 Florida at #1 Alabama - There are several keys to this game. Has Florida's passing game progressed to the point that they can take advantage of a young Alabama secondary? Can Florida slow down Mark Ingram and Trent Richardson and force Alabama to pass? What Florida be effective using Trey Burton in his multi-position role? And, lastly, how important is the fact that Florida's starting field goal kicker will miss the game with a back injury? If it becomes a battle of field goals, you have to like the Tide's chances. I think Florida will play well, and this should be a close, hard-hitting, entertaining game, but you have to like Alabama at home. But don't be surprised if these two teams play each other again in Atlanta in December.

Quarter says: Florida

Georgia at Colorado - This game is interesting if for no other reason than these are two teams that are absolutely, undeniably desperate for a win. Georgia is 1-3, winless in the SEC. Their only win is over Louisiana-Lafayette. The Bulldogs aren't in the top 29 in any statistical category. They are 30th in rushing defense and net punting. Then it goes downhill from there. I don't think Mark Richt is really on the hot seat. His record over the years is still pretty remarkable. His real problem is that he can't beat Florida. The Dawgs will get some help from wide receiver A.J. Green, who is returning from suspension. Colorado is 2-1. They have beaten Colorado State and Hawaii. In between, they got demolished by California. They are 7th in the nation in rushing defense. They are not in the top 39 in any other statistical category. Colorado probably would have canned Dan Hawkins after last year's 3-9 campaign, but the university couldn't afford the buyout on his contract. When in doubt, pick the speed of the SEC, and the head coach who knows how to win on the road. I'll take the Dawgs.

Quarter says: Colorado

#9 Stanford at #4 Oregon - Stanford is 4th in the nation in scoring offense. Oregon is 1st. But they have fattened up on the likes of New Mexico and Portland State (admit it, you didn't even know Portland State had a football team). This game could be really entertaining. It will definitely be a contrast of styles. Stanford, under Jim Harbaugh, looks more like a Big 10 team. They like to pound the ball to force the defense to cheat up to protect the line of scrimmage, and then have Andrew Luck toss the ball over their heads. Oregon likes to spread the defense all over the field, and then run into the spaces. The Ducks are favored here, but I think the Tree will do a better job on defense and get the win.

Quarter says: Oregon

Upon Further Review (Week 4)

2010-09-28T23:16:00.012-04:00

They May Bend But...

One thing we discovered Saturday was that Alabama's defense is still a work in progress. In the first half against Arkansas, they were unable to establish a pass rush, and Ryan Mallett made them pay. In the second half, the Tide dialed up the blitz, and Mallet started to look very average. Then he began tossing passes to the guys in the other jerseys. The Razorback offense that scored 17 points in the first half could manage only a field goal in the second half as the Tide caught up and then passed the punchless Hogs.

The lack of a pass rush has to be a concern - Alabama has just one sack in four games. But, somehow, they still lead the nation in scoring defense. Can Florida's still-developing passing attack stem the Tide? We'll find out soon enough.

NBC and Notre Dame Are Both Losing

As I was cruising through the channels on Saturday - clicking back and forth between several games that were actually good, I stumbled briefly on the Notre Dame-Stanford game on NBC. I don't remember what the score was at the time, but the Tree ended up winning 37-14, and the game wasn't even that close.

During the fifteen seconds that I stopped on NBC to catch the score, I found myself wondering... does someone in South Bend have incriminating photos of Dick Ebersol? Have they agreed to keep said pictures under wraps as long as NBC keeps renewing the contract that makes them the exclusive carrier of Notre Dame home games? What else could explain the ridiculous decision to continue torturing the NBC audience (what little there is of it during Notre Dame games) and the college football world in general with such an inferior product?

When you look at Ebersol's credentials, you realize the man is responsible for some of the most amazing televised sporting events ever, so it can't be a lapse in his judgement, can it?

Two years ago, when ESPN.com reported that Notre Dame and NBC had extended their contract through 2015, they noted that this was "despite the Fighting Irish last year drawing their lowest ratings since the network began broadcasting their games in 1991." What are the odds that the audience grew during last year's tumultuous 6-6 swan song for Charlie Weis? With the Irish off to a blazing 1-3 start this year, when I tuned in briefly, I may have doubled their viewing audience. Assuming Ebersol is still watching.

Since 2000, Notre Dame has had four coaches, and compiled a very pedestrian 71-55 record. Because they are Notre Dame, they have finagled invitations to three BCS bowl games in that time, and lost each of them. Badly. Oregon State whipped the Irish 41-9 in the 2001 Fiesta Bowl. The closest game of the three was the 34-20 loss to Ohio State in the 2007 Fiesta Bowl. The following year they got pounded by LSU in the Sugar Bowl, 41-14.

The same ESPN.com article quoted Ebersol as saying, "We go into this thinking that if the vast majority of the years has Notre Dame competitive in that top 10 or for that top 10 through the majority of the season, then we'll be very happy."

Dick, it's not 1949. It's 2010. The Irish haven't been great in a long time, and, right now, they're not even good. What the heck are you thinking?

Great Offense? Or Bad Defense?

Call me skeptical. Call me provincial. Call me whatever you want. But I need to see more from the Pac 10 before I start jumping on the conference bandwagon. Stanford may be legit (if you ask me, they look more like a Big 10 team), but, once again, we are faced with the old Pac 10 quandary. Are the offenses that good? Or are the defenses that bad?

Consider Oregon's performance on Saturday. Heading into the game, the Ducks were leading the nation in total defense and scoring defense, but yielded 597 yards and 31 points to Arizona State. The Sun Devils scored 31 points on the Ducks despite the fact that they turned the ball over seven times. Seven. How many points would they have scored if they could have actually held on to the ball on a regular basis? Oregon prevailed 42-31, but the two teams combined for over 1000 yards of total offense.

Great offense? Or bad defense?

In the season opener, and in a winning effort, USC still surrendered 36 points to Hawaii. Nevada may still be scoring touchdowns on Cal.

I'm not sure what to think, but we'll find out more this Saturday when Stanford visits Oregon, and Arizona State visits Oregon State.

Random Game Day Observations (Week 4)

2010-09-25T15:18:00.005-04:00

Rushing Roulette

The difference between Bud Foster and other defensive coordinators with shrunken cojonoes...? How many times have you seen a three man rush in long-yardage passing situations? Against Boston College, with a 16-0 lead early in the 4th quarter, and the Eagles facing a 3rd and 14 from their own 39, Virginia Tech blitzed. The result? BC loses 3 yards. Other coaches please take note. I despise the three man rush.

Riding the Pine

Speaking of Boston College, has anyone noticed that quarterback Dave Shinskie is terrible? First of all, he is a 26 year old "sophomore" after playing a few years of pro basbeball, so he should, in theory, be capable of making better decisions than your average 19 year old, but... no, not so much. In my opinion, once you take money for playing any professional sport, you should be ineligible for any college sport. But that's another story.

Secondly, he has a knack for making bad plays right when the opponent needs them. Let's just look at today's game. He has fumbled once and thrown two interceptions - one in the Virginia Tech endzone. The height of stupidity - trailing 7-0 with no time outs and a 1st and 6 from the Virginia Tech 11, but only 15 seconds remaining, Shinskie scrambled on a pass play. Ok, ok, he got within a yard of the end zone, but by then there was no time left on the clock. You have got to get at least a field goal attempt out of that. Unless, of course, you are Dave Shinskie.

But, hey, at least he improved over last year's performance in Blacksburg in which he went 1 for 12 for 4 yards and threw two interceptions, including a pick 6.

Currently, he is riding the pine, watching his backup lead the Eagles the rest of the way to a 19-0 loss.

Who's the Boss?

Is there a dominant team out there? Texas is currently losing at home to UCLA. It's only half-time, and it may not hold up, but...

Alabama and Arkansas are slugging it out. Both teams have looked good at times, but the quarterbacks have already combined to throw 3 interceptions in the first half - 2 by the Tide's McElroy.

In my view, the dominant team, at least until someone proves otherwise? Boise State.

My Crystal Ball Says...

2010-09-25T12:03:00.009-04:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

Week 4

Back by popular demand, it's My Crystal Ball. Thanks to those who e-mailed me at illegalprocedureblog@gmail.com and told me I was a slacker for not doing it for the first three weeks.

Look, I've known for a while that I was a slacker, so it wasn't really necessary for you to tell me that. Many times. Really.

Honestly, though, to present these picks the way I like to takes a lot of homework - looking at various sources to gather information and maybe dig up that tell-tale stat. And, after all that, I am wrong a third of the time anyway!

But that's one of the reasons I love college football - it's often unpredictable, and, as I have argued many times, almost anything can happen on any given Saturday. This is one of the reasons I have argued against a college football playoff. As ESPN says: Every Game Matters.

Now that we've established that, let's look at a few of this week's games that matter...

I think it is safe to argue that today's most important game among the alleged major programs is:

Georgia (1-2) at Mississippi State (1-2): This is a must-win game for Georgia. They began the SEC schedule with a road loss to South Carolina, and lost a close loss at home last week to Arkansas. Starting 0-3 in league play would be a disaster. At that point, you start thinking about bribing someone on the Independence Bowl selection committee. Oh wait, Georgia was just there last year.

I expected Mississippi State to be the most improved team in the league in the second year under Dan Mullen. And they may be, but it hasn't translated into victories. Of course, they have a lot to improve upon. Georgia hasn't lost three straight games since 1990. Normally, I'd take Mississippi State at home, but the Dawgs in red and black need a win badly.

#24 Oregon State (1-1) at #3 Boise State (2-0): Regular readers will know how I feel about Boise State. They are not a fluke. Their offense is multi-dimensional and unpredictable. They have one of the nation's best quarterbacks in Kellen Moore. Their defense is fast and physical. They have veterans everywhere on both sides of the ball. Let's be honest - would you want your favorite team to pay a visit to Boise next week? If you said Yes, you'd better check real quick to see if your pants are on fire. Oregon State is a solid team, but they have inexperience at the quarterback position, and the Rodgers Brothers are not enough to beat the Broncos at home.

#1 Alabama (3-0) at #10 Arkansas (3-0): It's tempting to believe that the Tide may be vulnerable on the road, and I've been hearing for several days now how tough it is to play in Reynolds Stadium. I've been there. It's very nice. But I'm not buying into the crowd noise thing. When you play in the SEC, that is normal. It's something you deal with regularly. So, no offense Razorback fans, but take your alleged roar and stuff it. Here's the key to this game - Arkansas is basically one dimensional. They are 3rd in the nation in passing, but 98th in rushing. Alabama is in the top 20 in both of those categories. That balance will be the difference. Roll Tide.

Best of luck to the Big 10 Plus 1, Soon to Have 12 Conference as they try to put fans in the seats or get anybody at all interested in today's games. The schedule: Illinois is off, Indiana hosts Akron, Iowa hosts Ball State, Michigan hosts Bowling Green, Michigan State hosts Northern Colorado, Minnesota hosts Northern Illinois, Northwestern hosts Central Michigan, Ohio State hosts Eastern Michigan, Penn State hosts Temple, Purdue hosts Toledo, and Wisconsin hosts Austin Peay. Let's go Peay!

Late Note: The guest picker on ESPN GameDay is former US Olympic ski racer Picabo Street. She may possess the second greatest name in sports, behind former NASCAR driver Dick Trickle.

Thursday Night Thought

2010-09-23T22:57:00.001-04:00

A brief observation on the Thursday game...

I'd like to know who it was that thought Pittsburgh could win the Big East. Whoever said that, wrote that, or even thought that, please raise your hand and be recognized as an imbecile.

Miami is nowhere near "back" - as last Saturday's game at Ohio State clearly demonstrated. Tonight, Jacory Harris has thrown two interceptions (that makes six already this year), and the Canes have had a punt return for a touchdown called back by penalty. But they're still beating Pitt easily.

Note to Pittsbugh offensive coordinator Frank Cignetti Jr: when your offensive line is being dominated by the defensive front seven, don't call plays that take three to five seconds to develop. It's just... um... dumb.

As I write this, the Panthers are 3 for 14 on third down, and have committed nine penalties (Miami has been whistled for seven penalties - the last two of which, true to the U form, have been personal fouls). The score is 24-3, and let's hope it mercifully ends that way. Soon. It's ugly.

So, for now, the Pittsburgh resume consists of a 38-16 win over the Wildcats of New Hampshire, to go along with losses to Utah and Miami. If the Panthers somehow manage to win the Big East this year, it will have less to do with their capabilities, and more to do with the woeful state of football in a basketball league.

Upon Further Review (Week 3)

2010-09-23T20:32:00.009-04:00

I know, I know. I just posted my Week 2 Review and Week 3 is already gone. Sue me. Or, better yet, pay me the big bucks to write these things and they'll always be on time. Or, almost always.

Don't Forget. I Was Right

It is the solemn duty of every alleged sports writer to remind his faithful readers every time his predictions come true, and to never again mention the predictions that backfire. Since I believe in solemn duties, I am choosing now to remind you that, when I discussed (here) the fact that the alleged Notre Dame Mystique no longer exists, I challenged readers to try to convince me that Notre Dame would start the season off with anything better than a 3-3 record.

Well, the Fleeing Irish are now 1-2, and the next three weeks have them playing #16 Stanford and then at Boston College, followed by a home game against Pittsburgh. You do the math.

Just remember I told you so...

Baby Gators

Since I have a strong University of Florida heritage, you'll get a moderate dose of Gator news here. Hey, if you don't like it, find a Seminole blog somehwere. Surely, there are at least one or two of them that know how to spell.

Anyway...

As if any of you need another reason to worry, here is something that should scare everyone but Gator fans.

As I pointed out here, the Gators played more freshman in their first game than any other team in the country.

Here is some complicated math courtesy of the Gainesville Sun following the Tennessee game:

Of the 70 players who made the trip to Knoxville 43 are underclassmen, 21 were on their first road trip and 19 played in their first road game.

The Knoxville News-Sentinel did the math this way: 41% of the players standing on the Florida sideline in Neyland Stadium were either freshman or redshirt freshman.

Note to the rest of the nation: this Gator team may struggle to get victories this season, but they'll get a bunch. Next year, watch out.

Conference Call

You'd pretty much have to be an idiot to think that there is a better college football conference in the land than the SEC. There is just too much evidence - objective, subjective and circumstantial.

ESPN.com's Ivan Maisel recently wrote a little more about that subject here. But there is a subtle nuance that often goes unmentioned, although I'm sure the athletic director at every SEC school knows all about it. Maisel points out that there are seven SEC football stadiums with a capacity of over 80,000 (no other conference has more than four stadiums that big), and those stadiums are filled to an average of 98% of capacity on game days. Think of all those seats, all those fans, paying for tickets.

When you combine that with fanatical booster support, merchandise and licensing income, TV revenues, and the payouts the league has collected from having put teams in BCS bowl games eighteen times since 1999, what that means is, in addition to speed, skill and talent, SEC teams have lots of money for nice things. Nice things attract new recruits. And new fans. And new TV contracts. And on-the-field success. And more national championships. And, thus, the cycle repeats itself.

Instant Chuckle:

Upon Further Review (Week 2)

2010-09-20T22:21:00.002-04:00

I hate sportswriters and broadcasters. Really. This week in college football gives us the perfect example why.

Every one of these idiots wants to write off Boise State already because Virginia Tech lost to James Madison. The argument is that this loss diminishes the importance of the Broncos win over the Hokies. Anybody who actually watched both games knows this is absolutely garbage.

First of all... As I have discussed before, transitivity doesn't apply in college football. The fact that Team A beat Team B, and Team B beat Team C doesn't mean that Team A can beat Team C.

Let me give you an example. In 2007, circumstances and the stars aligned in just the right way for Appalachian State to beat Michigan 34-32 at home in the season opener. Two weeks later, Appalachian State lost to Wofford College. If Wofford College had been scheduled to play Michigan later in the season, which one of you would have bet everything you own on the Terriers beating the Wolverines?

To further illustrate my point, which one of you - after Appalachian State's win over Michigan - would have picked the Mountaineers to beat Florida, the defending national champion? None? Obviously. But that same Michigan team that lost to Appalachian State went on to beat Florida 41-35 in the Capital One Bowl at season's end.

This is where things get tricky. Just because one team beats another on a given Saturday doesn't necessarily mean that team is better than the other, it just means they were better than the other team on that day. By the time you get to the end of a season, you can judge a team based on its complete body of work, but, on any given day, anything can happen. That is what makes college football so much fun. Every Saturday, there are different issues to be considered. Fatigue, injuries, weather and other physical and psychological factors can play a significant role. Home field can be a huge advantage. But the big thing - and this is what really separates college football from the pros - is emotions. This is why you hear the classic cliches about the "look ahead" game or the "letdown game."

Secondly... In my view, Boise State has done everything they need to do to establish BCS credibility. Before you start telling me how bad the WAC is, I'd like to point out the fact that the league contains Fresno State, Nevada and Idaho - teams that have had some measure of success in recent years. Could Boise State hold up to the week in week out punishment of the SEC or the Big 12? I don't know. Nobody knows. But they sure hold up now.

The Broncos record so far this decade is 119-19. If you were surprised by their physical domination of Oregon last year, maybe you shouldn't be; Boise State beat the Ducks in Eugene in 2008. If you were surprised that the Broncos knocked off previously unbeaten TCU in last year's Fiesta Bowl, maybe you shouldn't be; Boise State beat the 11-1 Frogs in the Fort Worth Bowl in 2003. That same year, they beat BYU in Provo. In 2006, they beat Oregon State, and ended that season with the now-famous Fiesta Bowl win over Oklahoma. They have compiled a 51-4 record since the start of the 2006 season, and finished unbeaten in 2006 and 2009. What do they have to do? Win a Super Bowl?

Thirdly, the Virgina Tech squad that lost to James Madison bore little resemblance to the Hokies that played Monday night. I watched that game, and they looked as tough and talented as any team I've seen play so far this year. Saturday afternoon, they were demoralized by their hard-fought loss, playing with just four days rest in horrendous weather against a team that was sky high. If they played fifty more times, that would probably be the only time James Madison won.

I don't mean to take anything away from James Madison. Yes, they caught Virginia Tech at a time when the Hokies were extremely vulnerable, but the Dukes were good enough to take advantage of it.

But Boise State has been good enough to win most of the games they play each year, and twice been good enough to win all of them. Let's not take anything away from them either.

Upon Further Review (Week 1)

2010-09-07T23:06:00.010-04:00

Bronco Bandwagon

I have told you this before, but, in case you forgot, I'm officially on the wagon. That's right. The Boise State bandwagon.

If you're one of those casual fans that vaguely remembers the Boise State win over Oklahoma in the 2007 Fiesta Bowl, you probably think the Broncos are just a collection of gimmicks and trickery. Well, think again.

[At this point, I am inserting the obligatory photo that includes Erin Andrews because, well, why wouldn't we want to include Erin Andrews?]

Anyway...

One game into their fifth season under head coach Chris Petersen, the Broncos have compiled a 50-4 record, including unbeaten seasons in 2006 and last year. That's not trickery. That's absolutely amazing.

Speaking of amazing, I was trying to resist the temptation to include this photo of a couple of Boise State cheerleaders, and then I thought, why resist?

Monday's victory over Virginia Tech was no fluke. Boise State dominated early, weathered a furious rally by a very talented Hokie squad, and, at a time when a lesser team might have folded under the pressure, scored the winning touchdown on their last possession.

All of this, mind you, was in front of a very pro-Hokie crowd at the ostensibly neutral site in Landover, Maryland.

This Boise State team could play with anybody in the country. And we'd better get used to the idea. They don't win with smoke and mirrors. They win with talent and guts.

I'm not convinced that I can watch too many games on the Smurf Turf without damaging my eyesight. But I'll be watching anyway. These Broncos have definitely gotten my attention.

Random Stat: Virginia Tech is now 0-22 in games away from home against top 5 teams.

Week 1 Surprises

This past Saturday brought us some interesting results.

Oklahoma managed to beat Utah State, but only by a mere seven points. Florida beat Miami of Ohio 34-12, but couldn't consistently get the shotgun snap into the hands of the quarterback. USC beat Hawaii, but saw their defense get shredded in a 49-36 shootout.

But there were two games that were particularly shocking: the Jacksonville State Gamecocks 49-48 upset of Mississippi,and the North Dakota State Bison's 6-3 win at Kansas.

Everything I have ever heard or read about Turner Gill tells me that he is a good guy. At Buffalo in 2006, he took over coaching a team that had gone 5-41 in its four previous seasons. In his first three years, he went 2-10, 5-7 and then 8-6 in 2008, including an upset of previously unbeaten Ball State in the MAC Championship game. That's about as good as you'll ever get at Buffalo, so it wasn't surprising when Kansas came calling last year after Mark Mangino was forced to resign amidst allegations that he verbally and physically abused some of his players.

But it's clear that Gill has his hands full with the rebuilding job in Lawrence.

The Kids Are Alright

Chris Low, the SEC beat writer for ESPN.com, pointed out some conference schools played lots of youngsters on Saturday. But Florida, as it turns out, played more freshman (15, to be exact) than any other school in the country. There is lots of talent in that locker room, but with so much youth on the field, the Gators may look a bit rough around the edges at times.

Kickoff !!

2010-09-03T00:24:00.001-04:00

It's Thursday and I'm watching college football! Someone pinch me. I might be dreaming.

It's finally here, and, as expected, the ESPN game - Southern Miss at South Carolina - was not the best of the night. Minnesota and Middle Tennessee were tied at 17 half way through the fourth quarter. The Gophers scored a late touchdown to get the win. Too bad the Blue Raiders had to play the game without their quarterback Dwight Dasher. Dasher was suspended for being an idiot. Last year, he passed for 2,789 yards and ran for 1,154. Do you think this team could have used him tonight?

Despite being ranked fifteenth, and being the overwhelming choice to win the Big East, Pittsburgh went to Utah as a three point underdog. I like the Utes. In my view, they've done everything they need to do to establish their football credibility. They've won BCS bowl games, and beaten BCS conference teams. They are the last team to beat Alabama. If you're lucky enough to have Versus on your cable or satellite package, you got to enjoy this game.

Here's a random statistic: The last time Utah lost a home game played on a Thursday was Thanksgiving Day. In 1954.

In this case, Pittsburgh kicked a field goal with three seconds remaining to force overtime, but the Utes prevailed 27-24, thus extending the Thursday home winning streak to thirteen games.

College football is here. Sweet...

New Resource for Info Buffs

I found a really cool online sortable set of college football data provided by - believe it or not - the Wall Street Journal. It's called The Whole Hundred Yards. The link is here. It's good enough that I think I will add it to my permanent set of links on the right side of this page.

Among the things I learned; the nation's heaviest offensive line belongs to... (drumroll)... Idaho. The Vandals average 333 pounds per man.

When Numbers Lie

2010-08-31T22:01:00.002-04:00

Always be cautious with the way you interpret and apply statistics. Somewhere, there is a set of numbers that, when manipulated and presented in a certain way, can be used to support almost any argument.

I used to wonder about that when I saw those old commercials that said 9 out of 10 dentists surveyed recommend such and such a chewing gum. Even then, I thought, exactly how was that question phrased?

Dear Dentist: Which are you more inclined to recommend for your patients? (A) Chewing Dentyne, or (B) Chewing a mouthful of greasy gravel from an old railroad bed.

It does make you wonder about the 1 out of 10 that chose greasy gravel. I'm guessing that most of them were from Tennessee.

And the rest were probably from Georgia.

But, anyway...

I thought about the use of statistics when I read Pat Forde's latest column on ESPN.com. I actually like Pat Forde. Sometimes. But, in support of his inclination to believe Wisconsin can be a contender in the Big 10 Plus 1, Soon to Have 12 Conference, he threw out the following stat:

When Wisconsin's line clicks, it wins: the Badgers were 10-0 when rushing for more than 150 yards last year and 0-3 when rushing for less; and they were 9-0 when allowing two or fewer sacks and 1-3 when allowing three or more.

On the surface, that sounds fairly impressive. It almost makes you want to believe in Wisconsin. But let's look a little deeper, shall we?

Let's consider the regular season (bowl game stats are often screwy). Wisconsin was 9-3. As Forde points out, in each of the the nine wins, they had 150 or more yards rushing. In each of the three losses, they had less than 150 (118, 87 and 99 respectively).

Let's consider the opponents. In the nine wins, the Badgers beat Northern Illinois, Fresno State, Wofford, Michigan State, Minnesota, Indiana, Michigan, Purdue and Hawaii. In the three losses, they choked against Ohio State, Iowa and Northwestern.

Northwestern didn't exactly have a great defense, but Wisconsin fell behind early, and, I think, got away from their game plan in a 33-31 loss.

Forde's Translation: The Badgers have a great offensive line that makes them a potential force in the Big 10 Plus 1, Soon to Have 12 Conference.

My translation: The Badgers are terrible against teams that are actually... you know... good.

Even as he praises Wisconsin, he does go on to tell us that, against Ohio State and Iowa - their two best opponents last year - the Badgers averaged just 2.7 yards per carry and gave up 10 sacks.

Forde's Translation: If their admittedly mammoth and allegedly great offensive line can improve on last year's performance in those big games, they have the potential to be a force in the Big 10 Plus 1, Soon to Have 12 Conference.

My translation: The Badgers are terrible against teams that are actually... you know... good.

So, as we enter this sure-to-be-terrific college football season, I urge you to remember that numbers lie. Sometimes. Unless you read them in one of my columns, in which case, they represent the absolute truth.

This column was brought to you by Dos Equis.

Although, I must admit I was rather disappointed when I found out that I was not the most interesting man in the world...

PS: Apologies in advance to my friend Bart - a longtime Badger fan - and his lovely wife Suzy, who may or may not ever speak to me again.

Things I Will Miss

2010-08-29T19:30:00.030-04:00

Oh wow. It's August... whatever the heck the date is... and, you know what that means! It's time to get Illegal Procedure wound up to full speed. Or at least take it out of neutral...

There are plenty of boring sites, mostly full of speculative garbage, that help you follow recruiting or spring practice or the NFL draft. I don't do any of that. Mostly, during the off-season, I drink beer. Then, once college football gets started, I drink more beer! Only I watch college football at the same time.

It's a remarkable system. I highly recommend it.

At the beginning of the season, I don't like to spend much time looking back. Last year is done and gone. But I don't like to look too far forward either. Should we really be talking about the favorites for the Heisman right now? It's August... whatever the heck the date is... for God's sake.

So I'm going to kind of look back and look ahead at the same time, and talk about things I will miss in this sure-to-be-terrific 2010 college football season...

Tim Tebow
Come on. You know you're going to miss him. He was the poster child for college football for the last three years. He is still the center of attention in the NFL despite the fact that he has yet to play a meaningful down for the Denver Broncos. He was a Heisman Trophy winner, a conference champion (twice) a national champion (twice), and a class act.

And he may have had the most publicized concussion in the history of mankind.

Even those who claimed to hate him secretly wished they could have him as their quarterback. It's okay, you guys. You can admit it now. It's time to fess up.

I thought his career in college football was nothing short of historic (and I said so here). I hope he wins a couple of Super Bowls to go with the rest of his football credentials.

Just for kicks, I did a Google search for his name and came up with 2,030,000 results. Good Lord.

Speaking of the Lord...

The Notre Dame Mystique
If, indeed, there ever was a Notre Dame mystique, now that it is 2010 and the Irish have been mediocre for more than two decades, can we all agree that the mystique is gone? Vanished? Kaput?

As if we didn't have enough proof on the football field, Touchdown Jesus was struck by lightning in June, and subsequently burned to the ground. Granted, it was a Touchdown Jesus in Monroe, Ohio, and not the one that has blessed Irish victories over the years, but that can't be a good omen, can it?

Notre Dame's Touchdown Jesus is still standing, but that's the only thing in South Bend about which that can be said.

I'd like to quote from a little piece I wrote last November called, When Irish Eyes Aren't Smiling (you can find it here):

Think about this for a minute. If you are an eighteen year old senior in high school now, and you probably didn't really start consciously watching college games on television until you were twelve or thirteen, that means your first meaningful memories of Notre Dame football were seeing them suffer through seasons of 5-7 (2003) and 6-6 (2004), and then watching them fire their second coach in four years.

Since I wrote that, they finished last season with a 6-6 record, fired Charlie Weis, and hired a good old Irishman named Brian Kelly. Notre Dame fans apparently expect Kelly to immediately improve their offense, and then produce a defense out of thin air. Good luck.

When was the last time anybody besides Beano Cook seriously considered the Irish to be a contender for the national championship? Beano has more chins than the Irish had victories last season. And we're still waiting for Ron Powlus to claim one of the three Heisman's he was supposed to win.

Here's an interesting statistic I stole from somewhere: Utah has more unbeaten seasons in the last six years (two) than Notre Dame has in the last thirty. That's particularly relevant because the Utes visit South Bend on November 13.

As an aside, and just for the record, nobody should ever mention the Utes without also allowing you to view this classic scene from My Cousin Vinny:

Anyway...

Look at Notre Dame's first 6 games this year- Purdue, Michigan, at Michigan State, Stanford, at Boston College, and Pittsburgh. Now try to convince me they're going to be better than 3-3 coming out of that stretch.

The game in Baltimore against Navy is no gimme (haven't the Middies taken 2 of the last 3 from the Irish?). In addition to the aforementioned game with Utah, there is the season finale at USC. If, with a bit of help from above, they manage a 4-2 start, Notre Dame will still have at least three tough games remaining on their schedule. And, with two losses more than likely before they even get past the second week of October, they will revert to being what they have been for the last twenty years - an afterthought.

Wave good-bye. The Notre Dame Mystique. Gone.

Bobby Bowden
As a Gator fan, there were few people that I despised over the years as much as Bobby Bowden. In retrospect, I think that was a bit unfair. I often thought he was a lax disciplinarian. I thought he tolerated a defense that stretched the limits of the rules of sportsmanship in an effort to intimidate. And I thought his whole "dadgummit" personality was mostly just an act to curry favor with the media.

I think I was at least partly right, but, at the same time, let's face it; I despised him because the Seminoles inflicted some serious pain on Florida under his direction. Although the Gators still have a substantial lead in the overall series (33-19-2), the most telling statistic is the record during the Spurrier years, which many consider the beginning of the golden era of the Gator Nation. While Steve Spurrier went 117-19 against everybody else in college football from 1990 to 2001, his record against Florida State was a frustrating 5-8-1.

But even that didn't keep me from feeling sympathy for Bowden when certain Seminoles decided to run him off campus at the end of last season.

In my view, he had earned the right to coach as long as he wanted to. The way he was tossed aside made me a little nauseous.

Once again, I'd like to quote from a piece I wrote in October last year called Stand Still Bobby While I Get That Knife Out of Your Back (you can find it here).

Bobby Bowden gave you a football program that was worth watching, when you actually bothered to show up, and now you want to unceremoniously shove him out the door. Unbelievable.

You were willing to sit back and gloat during the decade and a half that your Seminoles dominated college football like no other team ever has. Let Bowden enjoy the twilight of his coaching career as much as you enjoyed its prime.

But, the idiots in charge sent him packing, and I have to say I will miss seeing him on the sidelines this year. The good news is - now I can go back to hating Florida State without reservation.

Rational Numbers
To mathematicians, a rational number is any number that can be expressed as the quotient a/b of two integers, with the denominator b not equal to zero. I was never good at math, and I am only somewhat good at being rational. But will someone please drive directly to the conference offices of the Big 10 and the Big
12 and ask them what the heck they think they're doing?

As it was, the rest of the nation collectively giggled for a few years when Penn State joined the Big 10 in 1993, thus making it an 11 team league. But we kind of got used to it. And I suppose you have to give them credit for coming up with the clever logo that had an "11" conveniently embedded in it.

Then came the off-season shuffling this year that saw Nebraska leave the Big 12 to join the Big 10, and Colorado leave the Big 12 to join the Pac 10. None of this will take effect until after this season ends, but what you will end up with is a Big 10 that has 12 teams, and a Big 12 that has 10 teams.

But both conferences are keeping their old names. So much for rational numbers.

Yes, I know. It sounds like something from a Woody Allen movie. And I would probably laugh if it wasn't so... dumb. Seriously.

While all this was going on, the Pac 10 also lured Utah away from the Mountain West. But at least the Pac 10 is planning to change their name to the Pac 12.

Note to self: if ever I am the founder of a college athletic conference, don't put a number in the name.

Shameless Self-Promotion:
If you enjoy this blog, share it with friends. Heck, you can share it with enemies if you want. Comments are always appreciated. You can leave comments here on the blog. You can e-mail me at illegalprocedureblog@gmail.com. Or you can send me messages by carrier pigeon if you happen to have a bird trained to follow the scent of Stella Artois or Conundrum.

I'm ready for some college football!!

One last thing. I'd like to introduce a new feature that I will use at random when it pleases me. It is nothing more than a handy wave file designed to make you smile. I call it...

Instant Chuckle:

With No Tebow, What Will Gators Do on Third and Two?

2010-06-15T14:33:00.002-04:00

Here’s a question for you. Can you name Florida’s fullback last year? Go ahead, think for a minute. I’ll wait.

Give up?

It was Tim Tebow, of course. I know, I know, technically, he was the quarterback. But, when Florida needed to pick up the tough yards inside, that’s who carried the ball. And not just last season, but, really, for the last four. As the saying goes, it has been like a Fargo winter; you knew what was coming, and that information did you no good whatsoever.

Even when everybody knew what to expect, it was almost always successful. The only notable exception was Florida’s last possession in the 2008 home loss to Mississippi when Tebow was unable to convert a fourth and one. But the disappointment of that game prompted “The Promise ,” and Florida plowed through their remaining opponents on the way to a second national championship in three years. So, even that worked out pretty well.

For those expecting to witness the demise of the Gators in the post-Tebow era, I have bad news for you. This year’s offense should be more diversified and less predictable. A solid nucleus returns on the offensive line. The backfield is fast and deep. There are a handful of young but gifted receivers. And redshirt junior quarterback John Brantley has a strong, accurate arm. Big plays could become routine. But here is the one unanswered question: With no Tebow, what will the Gators do on third and two?

Florida enters the fall with two fullbacks on the roster, neither of whom has ever touched the ball in a college game. The biggest of the returning running backs is Emmanuel Moody . When given the opportunity, he has shown himself to be capable, but has missed six games with injuries in two seasons since transferring from USC. At 5'11" and 212 pounds, he is reasonably sturdy, but won’t exactly cause nightmares for SEC defenders.

While he isn’t the brute force that Tebow was, Brantley, at 6'3", 218 pounds, is more of an athlete than most people realize. But Florida’s coaches won’t be eager to have him risk injury carrying the ball. Behind him on the depth chart there are only freshman.

During spring drills, without making a big deal of it, the Gators experimented with having quarterback-turned-tight end Jordan Reed run plays out of the shotgun. Reed is listed at 6'3", 240 pounds. Think back, for a moment, to the 2006 season, when a young bruiser named Tim Tebow frequently relieved Chris Leak in short yardage situations.

Perhaps Florida’s "fullback" this year will be a redshirt freshman tight end named Jordan Reed.

By the way, Florida did have a fullback last year, a senior named Rick Burgess. And he did touch the ball. Once. He returned a squib kickoff for eight yards against Mississippi State.

The Mike Valenti Rant

2010-06-14T19:26:00.003-04:00

I was recently cleaning up old files on my laptop and discovered something that absolutely needed to be shared!

As part of the Valenti and Foster Show on WXYT-FM/AM in Detroit, Mike Valenti is known for being a bit harsh and crusty. And, as a Michigan State alum, you can imagine how he felt on Monday afternoon, September 25, 2006, when he sat down to do his show. Just two days before in East Lansing, Michigan State had squandered a 16 point lead against archrival Notre Dame. After leading 37-21 in the midst of a torrential downpour, the Spartans surrendered 19 straight points and lost 40-37.

When I first heard this back then, I laughed and laughed. But I knew how he felt. Every serious fan has had his favorite team cause moments of extreme frustration that defy logic and go beyond explanation. This was Mike Valenti's moment.

It's fifteen minutes long, so be sure you have some time when you sit down to listen to it. It takes him a few minutes to really get fired up, but it's well worth the wait...

Mascot Madness

2010-05-13T13:25:00.364-04:00

If you are in search of colorful stories and quirky traditions, the origins of some of the of the nation's college mascots are a great place to look. For a lengthy list of weird college names, you can start here, but I would like to share a little of my own mascot madness with you.

If you are a faithful follower of this blog, you know that I have become an Idaho fan. The only reason I can give is... how can you not like a team called the Vandals?

Oddly, it is not a direct reference to the Germanic tribe that sacked Rome in 455 AD, although that is the origin of the word. According to the Idaho athletics website, it was a tribute to the 1917 basketball squad whose aggressive style of defense was known to "vandalize" their opponents. A sports reporter for the school newspaper wrote in a season preview, “The opening game with Whitman will mark a new epoch in Idaho basketball history, for the present gang of ‘vandals’ have the best material that has ever carried the ‘I’ into action.”

By 1921, the name was official.

As a native of Massachusetts, I have a great apprecation for the unique history of the state. It makes perfect sense to me that the mascot of the University of Massachusetts should be a Minuteman.

But this is a clear example of how athletics and attitudes have changed. The university was established in 1863 as the Massachusetts Agricultural College. The first woman was admitted in 1892. In 1947, it officially changed its name to the University of Massachusetts at Amherst. Even then, when they chose their mascot, it may not have dawned on anyone that women would compete in intercollegiate sports. But, now, of course, they do.

That leaves U Mass in the uncomfortable position of calling their ladies' athletics teams the Minutewomen.

One of the strangest stories involves the origins of the Scottsdale Community College Artichoke.

The school was constructed in 1970 after a 99 year lease gave it access to a parcel of land on the Salt River Indian reservation. This was a time of social activism on college campuses, and the college's constitution was written in a way that gave the students an unusual amount of budget oversight and control.

While the administration saw athletics as a way to build school spirit and enhance its reputation, many students felt the priorities should be on stocking the shelves of the library and building a daycare for students with children.

The tension was constant.

According to an article on the SCC website, "Student government allotted 11 scholarships for the Indians on whose land the campus stood. The administration of that day had other ideas. It felt the scholarships could be put to better use by luring out of state athletes."

After stripping the student government of much of its power, and moving forward with plans to enhance SCC athletics, the administration, rather foolishly, allowed the student senate to conduct an election to name the school's mascot. The senate, in a fit of civil disobediance, offered three outlandish possibilities: the Scoundrels, the Rutabaga, and the Artichoke.

The Artichoke won.

Then the administration argued that the election was invalid, since only 11% of the students had voted. Another election was held, offering "the Drovers" as an alternative to the Artichoke. This time, the outcome was decided by nearly 80% of the vote.

The Artichoke won again.

So, Artie the Artichoke was born as the result of a student protest in Arizona.

When you read about the origins of the Delware Blue Hen, you understand why they are such a proud bunch.

In late 1775, the Continental Congress asked the state of Delaware to raise a regiment to add strength to the army fighting the British. The second of the eight companies formed was from Kent County, along the lower portion of the Delaware River.

According to the university's website, "The troops often amused themselves by staging cockfights with a breed known as the Kent County Blue Hen, recognizable for its blue plumage."

As the men from Delaware distinguished themselves in
battle, they also became known for the fighting reputation of their ferocious chickens.

The University of Delaware traces its roots to a small, private academy founded in 1743. They first began playing football in 1889, and, when choosing blue and gold as the school's colors, did so because those were the colors of George Washington's uniform, and because the first permanent colonists in Delaware were from Sweden, whose national flag is a gold cross on a blue background.

No article on strange mascots would be complete without mentioning the University of California at Santa Cruz.

The students at UCSC were a low key bunch, and wanted the school to reflect their attitude. They thought athletics should be available for all students, not just a select few. As a result, their club teams and intramural progams were very strong.

The university's website says, "The Banana Slug, a bright yellow, slimy, shell-less mollusk found in the campus's redwood forest, was the unofficial mascot for UC Santa Cruz's coed teams since the university's early years."

In 1980, when the university decided to participate in five NCAA sports at the Division III level, they needed an official team name in order to apply. The chancellor at the time, and a small group of athletes, supported the name Sea Lions. This did not sit well with the majority of the students. Even after a Sea Lion was painted on the gym floor, and a Sea Lion statue erected on campus, most continued to think of their teams as the Banana Slugs.

After five years of bickering, the student body was again asked to deliver their opinion in a non-binding vote. The Banana Slug won in a landslide.

In a recent issue, Time magazine placed the Banana Slugs first on a list of top ten worst team names. But, Reader's Digest had already named the Banana Slug the best college mascot in 2004. And, in 2008, ESPN Sports Travel named the Banana Slug as the best nickname in college basketball.

I thnk he's kind of cute.

My favorite new mascot story was provided to me recently by regular reader Matt Adams. It's not a college at all. It's the Arkansas School for the Deaf. They just recently announced that they have joined the Great Plains School for the Deaf Conference which will enable them to compete for championships in cheerleading, track, basketball, volleyball, and, of course, football.

The school dates back to 1850 in Fort Smith, Arkansas, through the efforts of a woman named Asa Clark. The Civil War forced the school to close, but it re-opened in 1868 in Little Rock as the Arkansas Deaf Mute Institute.

The school continued to grow and gain prominence. Dr. Alexander Graham Bell, the great experimenter in sound and electricity, visited the school in 1898. His wife, Mabel, was completely deaf as a result of scarlet fever contracted at age five.

In 1941, the ASD won the national basketball championship for schools for the deaf held at the Illinois School for the Deaf.

Their football team is small, but tough. Every player plays both offense and defense, all four quarters.

It's not clear when they chose their mascot, and it was certainly decades before the formation of any English rock bands, but, yes, ladies and gentlemen, they are the Arkansas School for the Deaf Leopards.

With that in mind, please press the play button below to enjoy my favorite selection from Def Leppard.

The Man Named Suh

2010-05-03T15:36:00.005-04:00

Want to know why Ndamukong Suh was the second player taken in the NFL draft? Watch this video...

By the way, he also seems to be a class act, having already pledged to donate more than $2 million to his alma mater to help refurbish their weight training facilities.

Flipping Out

2010-03-29T16:18:00.006-04:00

The video below is a perfect illustration of what makes major college football downright scary. During warm-ups for the International Bowl in December, South Florida's Kion Wilson and Jason Pierre-Paul decided to find out who could do the most back flips. See for yourself...

Here is the scary part: Jason Pierre-Paul (the guy who did 13 back flips) is a defensive end who is listed at 6-6, 260. He runs the 40 yard dash in 4.64 seconds. He finished 2009 with 6.5 sacks and 16.5 tackles for loss. All I can say is... wow.

Down Time - News Time - Draft Time

2010-03-29T16:00:00.002-04:00

I should take a moment to tell my faithful readers that we somehow managed to triple our regular traffic on this blog last fall. That wouldn't be too impressive if it went from three readers to nine, but we're talking thousands of people here (yes, there is built-in computer code to help me track readership). Obviously, most of my fans are in the US, but I have readers in Italy, the Russian Federation, the UK, France, Indonesia and South Africa. So, I urge you to keep doing what you have been doing. If you like what you are reading, share it with friends. If you have an idea for something different, share it with me.

I received overwhelmingly positive feedback to the Moments in College Football History features, here (1), here (2), here (3), and here (4). So, I expect to do more of the same this coming season. Let me know if there are Moments in College Football History that interest you.

Illegal Procedure is mostly on hiatus during the offseason for college football. If I find something that is exceptionally interesting or funny, I'll post it. So it never hurts to check back here from time to time. If you find something that is exceptionally interesting or funny, please send it to me and I'll post it.

If you are looking for news on recruiting, I recommend that you go here --> Rivals.com, here --> Scout.com or here --> ESPN.com's Recruiting Page.

If you are looking for the latest on the NFL Draft, I recommend that you go here --> NFL.com's Draft Page or here --> ESPN.com's NFL Draft Page.

Finally, my host (Blogspot.com) occasionally makes changes to their formatting and coding. Sometimes it affects pictures, graphics or links that I posted previously. I will continue to try to peruse old posts and keep everything as tidy as possible, but, if you find missing images or broken links that I haven't yet found, let me know and I will replace or remove them.

Thanks!

X's and O's

2010-03-29T15:07:00.004-04:00

While at West Virginia, coach Rich Rodgriguez (now at Michigan) recorded this video explaining some fundamentals of the spread offense...

Lights, Cameras.... action?

2010-02-01T12:00:00.004-05:00

A recent survey by the Wall Street Journal provided some interesting data. NFL games were the specific subject, but it's safe to assume that the numbers would be similiar for telecasts of college football.

Here are some of the results:

The average telecast of a football game is 174 minutes long.

During that time, viewers get about 60 minutes of commercials. They also get to watch about 75 minutes of players huddling or standing around between plays.

Replays consumed 17 minutes.

How much time was devoted to actual football plays? About 11 minutes.

The average play takes just 4 seconds, and the broadcast networks have become masters at filling the time between snaps. Maybe that's why football has become the quintessential American television viewing sport; there's plenty of time to gorge on beer and pretzels without missing the action.

Link to Article HERE.

Another Bandwagon

2010-01-28T14:06:00.001-05:00

I've been thinking about it - had time to think now that the college football season is over - and I am jumping on another bandwagon. In the entry below this one, I wrote about Boise State. I have nothing but admiration for the way they play the game. So I've decided to be a Broncos fan.

If you read the previous entry, and did not click on the link for the Three Plays That Shocked the World, I urge you to watch it here. Broncos offensive coordinator Bryan Harsin explains each of the three key plays from the 2007 Fiesta Bowl. It is entertaining and enlightening as well.

Upon Further Further Review (Bowls - Part II)

2010-01-11T17:27:00.004-05:00

More Than Just Turf to Repair

Someone should be fired. Somewhere, there is an idiot, or group of idiots, responsible for the field conditions at the Citrus Bowl in Orlando.

I don't know much about planting things or growing things. I've had fake office plants shrivel up and die on me. But I'm reasonably certain that I could have kept the Citrus Bowl turf in better condition than it was for the Champs Sports Bowl and the Capital One Bowl.

Nobody should have to play a football game on terrain more suited for trench warfare.

It is not safe for the athletes, and, in this case, I think it may have affected the outcome. Is it just a coincidence that the slower, plodding teams won both of the games played there? Would Wisconsin have beaten Miami on a pristine field? Maybe. Could Penn State have kept up with LSU? I doubt it.

After the game, LSU reciever Brandon LaFell said, "That was by far the worst football field I've ever seen in my life."

Now the city of Orlando has more than just turf to repair. The image of a vacation mecca is certainly damaged too. At least for fans of the four teams that had to watch the turf peel away in clumps. This is a city that knows how to do amusement parks, but athletic fields are another matter entirely.

Broncos Bucking the System

After finishing the season unbeaten for the second time since 2006, Boise State now appears ready to muscle their way to the front of the line in college football. They should start next season in or near the top five in the preseason polls, which gives them a chance to climb higher if teams in front of them stumble.

Here's the scary part, they return 21 starters from this year's squad, including quarterback Kellen Moore, who finished second in the nation in passing efficiency.

They are doing everything they can to bolster their schedule. The perception is that the WAC doesn't offer them enough competition, even though Idaho, Nevada and Fresno State went to bowl games this year.

Boise State opened the 2009 season by dominating eventual PAC 10 champion Oregon, and ended it by defeating unbeaten Mountain West champion TCU. In 2010, they will play Oregon State at home on the famous Smurf Turf, and Virginia Tech in a (sort of) neutral site game at FedEx Field in Landover, Md.

But, now, the big boys are a bit squeamish about scheduling a game with the Broncos. They have a reputation for playing with reckless abandon that makes their opponents nervous.

In the 17-10 win over TCU, the key play was an amazing fake punt that Boise State ran on a 4th and 9 from their own 33 yard line. The play gained 30 yeards. Gutsy? Absolutely. Typical of Bronco football? Without a doubt.

Boise State's win over Oklahoma in the 2007 Fiesta Bowl has rapidly become the Woodstock of college football. If as many people actually saw it as are now claiming to have seen it, the broadcast would have had about a 50 rating.

The Three Plays That Shocked the World - the Hook and Ladder on 4th and 18 from midfield that went for a touchdown to send it to overtime, the halfback pass for the overtime touchdown, and the Statue of Liberty on the two point conversion that won the game - captured the attention of the football-loving world.

Boise State coach Chris Petersen says, "I think that's what they expect out of us, and we're happy to deliver."

The drama even had a storybook ending when Ian Johnson, who had just run in the two point conversion for the 43-42 win, then scurried off to find his cheerleader girlfriend to ask her to marry him.

Now that opponents have come to expect the unexpected, they still can't stop it. As Matt James notes in the Fresno Bee, "Boise State football is now a Fargo winter. You know what's coming, and that information does you no good whatsoever."

Just ask TCU coach Gary Patterson, who admitted that his team had worked on stopping the fake punt in practice, but failed to do so with the game on the line, "The fake punt was a great call," he said. "They outcoached us on that play."

Bronco kicker Kyle Brotzman, who threw the pass on the play, had a simpler explanation. "That's Boise State football," he said.

Next season is likely to bring increased media scrutiny for the Broncos, and more pressure. But, after going 14-0 this year, and 49-4 since 2006, they might be ready to assume a position among the college football elite. One thing is certain, if the next BCS game they play in is the championship game, expect the unexpected.

Upon Further Further Review (Bowls)

2010-01-03T17:40:00.000-05:00

I started off the bowl season by going 2-6 on my first eight picks, which is to say... I suck. I currently stand at 13-12 with four games remaining, so I suppose I should be happy that I could finish above .500.

Some initial thoughts...

I thought Nevada would play better.

I thought Wisconsin would play worse.

I over-estimated the PAC 10. And the Big East.

The best game, so far, was Idaho's last-second win over Bowling Green. Vandals coach Robb Akey goes for the two point conversion, and the 43-42 win, with :04 left. Always happy to see a gamble like that pay off.

Air Force and Navy both won impressively.

Arizona failed to show up.

Connecticut played their hearts out for their lost teammate.

Bobby Bowden went out a winner.

Florida showed that the loss to Alabama was, indeed, an aberration.

For some reason, I find myself siding with Mike Leach.

My Crystal Ball Says...

2009-12-23T23:23:00.001-05:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

It's bowl time.

12/23/2009 Poinsettia Bowl -- California vs Utah
My pick: Utah

12/24/2009 Hawaii Bowl -- Nevada vs SMU
My pick: Nevada

12/26/2009 Little Ceasars Bowl -- Ohio vs Marshall
My pick: Ohio

12/26/2009 Meineke Car Care Bowl -- Pittsburgh vs North Carolina
My pick: North Carolina

12/26/2009 Emerald Bowl -- USC vs Boston College
My pick: Boston College

12/27/2009 Music City Bowl -- Clemson vs Kentucky
My pick: Kentucky

12/28/2009 Independence Bowl -- Georgia vs Texas A&M
My pick: Georgia

12/29/2009 Champs Sports Bowl -- Miami vs Wisconsin
My pick: Miami

12/30/2009 Humanitarian Bowl -- Idaho vs Bowling Green
My pick: Idaho

12/30/2009 Holiday Bowl -- Arizona vs Nebraska
My pick: Nebraska

12/31/2009 Armed Forces Bowl -- Houston vs Air Force
My pick: Houston

12/31/2009 Sun Bowl -- Oklahoma vs Stanford
My pick: Stanford

12/31/2009 Texas Bowl -- Missouri vs Navy
My pick: Navy

12/31/2009 Insight Bowl -- Minnesota vs Iowa State
My pick: Iowa State

12/31/2009 Chick-fil-A Bowl -- Virginia Tech vs Tennessee
My pick: Virginia Tech

1/1/2010 Outback Bowl -- Auburn vs Northwestern
My pick: Auburn

1/1/2010 Gator Bowl -- West Virginia vs Florida State
My pick: West Virginia

1/1/2010 Capital One Bowl -- Penn State vs LSU
My pick: LSU

1/1/2010 Rose Bowl -- Oregon vs Ohio State
My pick: Oregon

1/1/2010 Sugar Bowl -- Florida vs Cincinnati
My pick: Florida

1/2/2010 International Bowl -- South Florida vs Northern Illinois
My pick: South Florida

1/2/2010 Papa Johns.com Bowl -- South Carolina vs Connecticut
My pick: South Carolina

1/2/2010 Cotton Bowl -- Ole Miss vs Oklahoma State
My pick: Mississippi

1/2/2010 Liberty Bowl -- Arkansas vs East Carolina
My pick: Arkansas

1/2/2010 Alamo Bowl -- Texas Tech vs Michigan State
My pick: Texas Tech

1/4/2010 Fiesta Bowl -- TCU vs Boise State
My pick: TCU

1/5/2010 Orange Bowl -- Georgia Tech vs Iowa
My pick: Georgia Tech

1/6/2010 GMAC Bowl -- Central Michigan vs Troy
My pick: Troy

1/8/2010 BCS Championship -- Alabama vs Texas
My pick: Alabama

Moments in College Football History

2009-12-16T16:24:00.026-05:00

In tribute to the Army-Navy game, I decided to write about one of the many significant moments in the long history of the Army football program, but which one? After a bit of digging I stumbled on this story, and had no idea how absolutely fascinating it would be...

Tonight, We Will Know If You Are Warriors

On November 9th, 1912, the Carlisle Indians walked on to Cullum Field at West Point for a much-anticipated game against the Army Cadets. The team from the Carlisle Indian Industrial School in Pennsylvania had become something of a media sensation. They were in the midst of a three year stretch during which they would compile a record of 33-3-1.

Legendary coach Glenn "Pop" Warner had taken advantage of the game's evolving rules, and developed an offense that was as entertaining as it was successful. He employed the forward pass as effectively as any team of the time, and had perfected the "single wing" formation. Now, he was about to reveal a new twist to the Cadets, and the college football world.

Eastern city-dwellers had become fascinated by this team that, like their proud ancestors, incorporated speed, stealth, and deception into their plan of attack. And, of course, the Carlisle squad included Jim Thorpe, only four months removed from winning gold medals for the pentathlon and decathlon in the 1912 Olympics in Stockholm.

Born on a small Sauk and Fox Indian reservation outside of Prague, Oklahoma to a half-irish and half-Indian father, and a half-French and half-Indian mother, Jim Thorpe was drawn to the Carlisle Indian Industrial School because of its reputation in sports, football in particular.

The Carlisle Indian Industrial School had been founded in 1879 by Captain Richard Pratt. After serving in the Union army during the Civil War, he had commanded the 10th Cavalry Regiment - the now famous Buffalo Soldiers - and employed many Native Americans as scouts.  Recognizing the plight of plains Indians, he became convinced that the best way to end the hostilities with white settlers, and the government, was to force them to abandon their heritage and assimilate into the "majority" culture. "Kill the Indian, save the man," Pratt would say. By 1902, the Federal government had established twenty-six Indian boarding schools designed to provide the knowledge and skills necessary to survive in the white man's world.

By the time Thorpe began playing football, coach Warner had already achieved considerable success at Carlisle, and was responsible for a number of innovations that would fundamentally change the game. He had enhanced the use of the forward pass, and was the first to employ the screen pass. He developed the spiral punt, the use of shoulder and thigh pads, and special helmets. He created the single wing formation and the hidden ball trick.

Thorpe added speed and agility to an already accomplished backfield. On the very first carry of his career, he hesitated, and was tackled for a loss. On the next play, he ran for forty-five yards.

Warner's offense used misdirection like no other coach had. When Carlisle beat perennial powerhouse Harvard for the first time, in 1907, a Boston Herald story on the game said, "Only when a redskin shot out of the hopeless maze ... could it be told with any degree of certainty just where the attack was directed."

Warner was the first to encourage his team to use audibles and hand signals, enabling them to communicate more readily while aligning, often with words or gestures unique to Native Americans, and baffling to their opponents. With Thorpe's athletic ability added to the equation, the effect was intimidating.

It was a finely-tuned offensive machine that arrived in West Point in 1912 with a 9-0-1 record, the only blemish being a scoreless tie with Washington and Jefferson College in an uninspired effort that had irritated Warner. But, on this November day, he was certain his Carlisle Indians would find inspiration.

The Army squad also brought an impressive resume to the field. They were in the midst of a four year period in which they would compile a record of 28-5-1. No fewer than nine future generals were on the 1912 team.  Among them was a slightly undersized, but powerful athlete named Dwight Eisenhower. They played fierce defense, having surrendered just thirteen points in the four previous games combined.

This game would match Army, and the nation's best defense, against Carlisle, and their high-scoring offense, but the underlying implications were far more significant. If anything symbolized the Native American struggle against intrusion from white settlers and their confict with the government, it was the Army.

Only twenty-two years before, in 1890, the last major confrontation between the Army and Native Americans occurred when soldiers from the 7th Cavalry surrounded a Lakota camp and massacred 146 men, women and children near Wounded Knee Creek, South Dakota.

Although Carlisle began fielding football teams by 1893, fear of open hostility had kept them from scheduling games against Army. Despite being among the top programs of their era, the two teams had met only once prior to 1912, a 6-5 Carlisle victory in West Point in 1905.

When they lined up for the opening kickoff in the 1912 game, it was not only two of the best teams of their day, but old adversaries from bitter battles of the past. In the locker room beforehand, Warner told his players, "Your fathers and your grandfathers fought their fathers. These men playing against you today are soldiers. They are the Long Knives. You are Indians. Tonight, we will know if you are warriors."

Some versions of the story say he also told his players to "remember Wounded Knee." In any event, the intent was clear. He wanted them to know that this was not just one of the biggest games of the year in college football, it was an opportunity for revenge.

As the teams emerged from the locker rooms on a cold, gray day, Dwight Eisenhower paced the Army sideline eyeing Jim Thorpe. Eisenhower had become the leader on a team of leaders, mostly through sheer determination. In those days, players stayed on the field for offense and defense, and, although he was a solid halfback, it was as a linebacker that Eisenhower hoped to, literally, make his biggest impact that day.

Months before, when he had first learned that Carlisle would be paying a visit to West Point, Eisenhower had begun dreaming about tackling Thorpe in a way that would leave a lasting impression. If he could intimidate him, that would be great.  If he could knock him out of the game, that would be even better.

On at least two occasions in the first half, Eisenhower hit Thorpe as hard as he could, once forcing a fumble, and once combining with one of his teammates in a collision that left all three players dazed on the ground.

At first, Army used their superior strength and size to overpower the Indians, taking a 6-0 lead after scoring a touchdown and missing the extra point. The Army players were, on average, four inches taller and twenty-five pounds heavier than the Indians. But the Carlisle offense was a blur of motion and trickery, and the Cadets were soon running all over the field trying to make sense of it, and trying to stop it.

A New York Tribune correspondent wrote, "The shifting, puzzling, and dazzling attack of the Carlisle Indians had the Cadets bordering on a panic. None of the Army men seemed to know just where the ball was."

The standard formation of the day had two halfbacks and a fullback in the backfield, behind the quarterback. It was a power formation that could concentrate blockers in one area for maximum effect. But Carlisle had begun using a single wing formation developed by Warner. One of the halfbacks would line up just behind the line of scrimmage on the shoulder of the tackle. Aligning that way would put him outside the defensive end, giving him a good angle to throw a block, but also giving him room to escape from the backfield to catch a pass.  And it gave him time to build a head of steam if he were to run around the opposite end behind the line of scrimmage on a reverse. Basically, it was the earliest incarnation of the spread offense.

Now Warner decided to unleash the latest variation on his offense. The Indians had worked on it all summer, but had chosen not to show it until now. They wanted "the soldiers" to be its first victim.

They broke the huddle and shuffled into a standard alignment, but, on a signal from quarterback Gus Welch, shifted into a "double wing." Alex Arcasa, at right halfback, shifted to a spot outside the right tackle. Thorpe, at left halfback, moved outside the left tackle.  The Indians then embarked on a series of reverses, double reverses and fleaflickers. No one had ever seen anything like it.

A New York Times story on the game reported, "Thorpe tore off runs of ten yards or more so often that they became common."   He would rush for nearly 200 yards on twenty-four carries. He scored twenty-two of Carlisle's twenty-seven points.

Eisenhower would never get the knockout blow he hoped for. Early in the second half, he lunged at a sprinting Thorpe, but, in a remarkable display of agility, Thorpe stopped in his tracks and watched as Eisenhower crashed into his own teammate. Although he didn't know it at the time, Eisenhower had ruined his knee trying to make the tackle, and effectively ended his football career. Unable to continue, he spent the rest of the game in the locker room, furious.

They had kept the game close, trailing 7-6 at halftime, but the exhausted Cadets were unbable to move the ball in the second half.  They couldn't even manage a first down as Carlisle pulled way to win 27-6.

After the game, reporters asked Army team captain Leland Devore about Thorpe's performance. "He is super-human," he said. "That is all. There is no stopping him."

The Indians would finish the season at 12-1-1. A 34-26 loss at Pennsylvania cost them a national championship.

The Carlisle Indian Industrial School was closed in 1918, and the property was used as a hospital for wounded soldiers returning from World War I. The Carlisle Barracks are now the home of the Army War College.

Jim Thorpe would go on to play professional football, baseball and basketball, but the man often considered to be the greatest American athlete of the twentieth century struggled later in life, particularly during the Great Depression. He was stripped of his Olympic medals in a controversy over his amateur status (they were reinstated in 1982). Failed marriages and trouble with alcohol plagued him.

When he died in 1953, he was living in a trailer home in Lomita, California. His family received a telegram from the White House, condolences from president Dwight Eisenhower.

Silly Video of the Week

2009-12-07T18:12:00.002-05:00

Watch these Vermont high school football highlights closely at the 1:30 mark as Mount Mansfield beats Otter Creek on the last play, and you'll see a lesson learned the hard way.

Upon Further Further Review (Week 14)

2009-12-07T17:58:00.005-05:00

Pressure

By the time we have reached this point in every college football season for the past several years, I am tired, so I know the players and coaches involved must be exhausted.

The physical grind is as tough as ever, but, these days, the psychological toll of being one of the top programs is absolutely ridiculous.

I thought of this as I got the news Sunday night that Florida head coach Urban Meyer had checked into a hospital in the early morning hours after the Gators lost to Alabama in the SEC Championship game. "I've lost a lot of weight this season," he said. "I just have to take better care of myself. It's been a tough season. A great season, but a tough season."

If there is one big difference between this year's Gators, and the championship teams of the past, it is the fact that they started at the top this year, rather than coming from behind. The pressure mounted weekly, and the media feeding frenzy was so persistent and shameless that I was actually embarassed for my former colleagues in the world of sports journalism.

Tim Tebow's concussion had to be the most scrutinized sports-related injury ever. It literally got to the point where sports news websites would write an entire story just to tell us that there was nothing new to report. I thought it was stupid at the time, and I said so.

Then, one Florida player is arrested, and it is immediately splashed on websites across the universe and scrolling across the bottom of the screen on each of ESPN's many channels. Meanwhile, half of the Michigan State squad storms a party like members of a goon squad, and assaults a room full of people. Two players were kicked off the team, and eight others are suspended for the Spartans' trip to the Alamo Bowl against Texas Tech. But, somehow, that gets buried at the back of the sports section.

I suppose there are rewards that come with riding the top of the rankings for most of the season, but the effect of the pressure, apparently, can be enough to require hospitalization.

When Every Game Matters

I understand the desire to establish a college football playoff in the FBS (Division I). On the surface, it seems like the American way. Let them decide it on the field. Play until there is only one team standing.

But part of what makes major college football exciting is the fact that every game really does matter. In past years, top teams could recover from an early loss, but not this year, not in a season in which five unbeatens still remain at the end.

The stakes are enormous, and the pressure intense. And look what we ended up with at the end; an SEC Championship game that was basically a play-in for the BCS Championship game; a Big 12 Championship game that meant all or nothing for Texas, and was obviously pretty important to Nebraska too; Oregon and Oregon State playing for the right to go to the Rose Bowl, Cincinnati and Pittsburgh, and Georgia Tech and Clemson fighting to the bitter end for the top spot in their respective leagues, East Carolina squeaking by Houston to win Conference USA.

It was an exciting ending to an intriguing regular season. And it was all the more intriguing because every game mattered.

Bandwagon Update

Since I proclaimed my new-found love for Idaho and Richmond back on October 27, they have had their share of struggles. It appears that I do not have the luck of the Irish. Or anybody else. And neither do the teams that I adopt.

The Vandals lost four of their last five games, but still managed to finish 7-5, and earn a trip to the Humanitarian Bowl to play Bowling Green.

While I'm sure head coach Robb Akey would have preferred a stronger finish, it is still the most regular season wins for Idaho since they went 7-4 in 1999.

Although they still have the coolest helmets ever, Richmond had some struggles of their own.

After starting the season with a win at Duke, and charging to an 8-0 record, the Spiders lost at home to Villanova on November 11, and then lost to Appalachian State in the quarterfinals of the FCS playoffs, finishing the season at 11-2.

The biggest loss,though, may have come yesterday, when it was announced that head coach Mike London would be leaving to take the head coaching job at the University of Virginia.

With Tebow, We Are Witnessing History

2009-11-30T21:26:00.014-05:00

Saturday afternoon, when I walked into Ben Hill Griffin Stadium at Florida Field, I knew I was about to be part of something special, but I didn’t really know how to define it. It was a feeling for which I had yet to find the right words, but the first thing I saw put it into perspective. Stadium cameras captured the image of a woman holding a sign, and the picture appeared on the giant video screens in each endzone: “We are witnessing history.”

It was Senior Day, the final home game for twenty-four Gators whose accomplishments will be scattered in Southeastern Conference and college football record books for years to come. And it was the last hurrah for Tim Tebow, the quarterback whose own tears as he was introduced before the game prompted an outpouring from tens of thousands of adoring fans. I might not have believed it if I hadn’t seen it myself. After my eyes dried up.

I didn’t say much to anybody during the game. The 37-10 drubbing of arch rival Florida State didn’t really require audience participation. The outcome was never in doubt. I clapped quite a bit, cheered occasionally. Mostly, I watched. I looked around. I soaked it in.

During the second half, each time the Gator offense lined up for a play, little points of bright, white light exploded everywhere in the crowd. First dozens, then hundreds. The flash bulbs of those wanting to capture the memories.

Like most of the 90,907 people in attendance, I stayed until well after the game was over. Even Seminole fans lingered. Moments like that don’t happen too often.

Tim Tebow has endured more scrutiny than anyone his age should. His late-September concussion attracted media attention like no other sports-related injury ever. Some fans at opposing schools have even come to despise his constant presence in print and on television. They question his Christianity, insisting it is just for show. Surely, there is a different Tebow in there somewhere, one that is just like so many high-profile athletes; greedy, selfish, flawed. Surely, he is just using the limelight for his own gain. If not, how could he end up on ESPN so often?

I’ll tell you how. Because he is such a good story.

Tebow seeks the light, but not that kind of light. He is as competitive as any athlete I have ever seen, but he still wants you to realize there is more to life than just winning games. He is a young man who refuses to compromise in an age when everything is negotiable. He wants to help make the world a better place in an age when people have a hard time believing anyone could really want such a thing. If there are Tebow haters out there, it is not because they don’t want to be constantly reminded of what he is, but because they don’t want to be constantly reminded of what they aren’t.

If I stood for anything when I was twenty-two, it was probably my right to wear obscenely torn blue jeans, and not visit the barber as often as I should. Mission trip to the Phillipines? Not likely. Visiting prisoners? Or sick kids in the hospital? Sorry. Try again.

I am not someone who has strong religious convictions, and I am not claiming to agree with everything he preaches, but I respect the fact that, for him, it’s not an act. It’s genuine. He lives according to his beliefs. And he cares in a way that few people ever bother to. In the Gator Nation, he has really made a difference. Head coach Urban Meyer said, "I've never seen anything like it. He's made ‘unselfish’ kind of a cool thing."

So, Gator fans, myself included, stayed on Senior Day to watch Tebow make the rounds of the stadium wall one more time, wanting to give back some of what we have been given. It was worth the wait.

Even though he has won a Heisman Trophy, and been part of teams that won two SEC championships and two national championships, he is not the best athlete ever. He is not even the best quarterback ever, at least in terms of pure physical skill. But he may the best ever at pushing the people around him to be better. On the field. And off.

Saturday night, Meyer was quick to point out that, while this may have been the last home game for Tebow and teammates, the season is not yet over, “The good thing is, we’re not done.”

There is a game remaining against Alabama in the SEC Championship. A victory there would put them back in the BCS Championship game for the third time in four years. In any event, thousands of the Gator faithful will be watching every second.

After all, we are witnessing history.

Upon Further Review (Week 12)

2009-11-24T12:02:00.044-05:00

When Irish Eyes Aren't Smiling

Nothing is going well at Notre Dame these days. There is even a rumor that a group on a religious pilgrimage to South Bend saw teardrops falling from the eyes of Touchdown Jesus.

Things are so bad that quarterback Jimmy Clausen was sucker-punched by an angry fan in a local restaurant on Sunday.

A Notre Dame fan.

The latest word is that the shiner he sustained won't keep him from playing at Stanford on Saturday, where he and his teammates are likely to get more of the same.

But, if the alleged experts are correct, it appears the Charlie Weis era is coming to an end.

The Notre Dame faithful seem to feel they have a divine right to a superior football team, but they keep picking the wrong guy to lead the reformation. Since 1996, when Lou Holtz departed after eleven seasons with a 100-30-2 record, his three successors have combined to go 91-65.

Under Weis, the Irish are 1-11 against ranked teams, and currently 35-26 overall, which means not only do they fail to win the big games, but they sometimes struggle to win the little ones.

Something has to change. And soon.

The alleged experts tell us that Notre Dame's reputation alone will always provide a strong pull for recruiting, but I'm not sure that's true.

Think about this for a minute. If you are an eighteen year old senior in high school now, and you probably didn't really start consciously watching college games on television until you were twelve or thirteen, that means your first meaningful memories of Notre Dame football were seeing them suffer through seasons of 5-7 (2003) and 6-6 (2004), and then watching them fire their second coach in four years.

Meanwhile, USC, Florida, Alabama, LSU, and Texas have been racking up wins and owning the airwaves.

Weis may or may not have been the wrong guy for the job, but Notre Dame has really been led down the wrong path by the people above him.

Meddling from the university president and its board of trustees has made the job of athletic director at Notre Dame a difficult one. When Tyrone Willingham was fired after just three seasons, it was against the wishes of then athletic director Kevin White. It is interesting to note that he was the first Irish coach in 47 years to be fired before his initial contract had expired.

From 1914 to 1987, Notre Dame had a total of six athletic directors. When Jack Swarbrick was hired last year to take over for White, he became the fourth AD since '87. If you count George O'Leary, who was fired just five days after his hiring, when it was discovered he had taken some creative liberties with his resume, Weis is the fourth football coach hired since Holtz left.

Something's clearly not right.

Cutting Weis loose will be expensive - the buyout on his contract is rumored to be as much as $18 million - but the cost isn't purely financial. Notre Dame's reputation has suffered along the way, and continues to suffer. It's not the dream job it used to be. Already, Florida's Urban Meyer, once thought to be a prime candidate, very quickly, and very publicly, removed his name from any further speculation.

Several other names have been tossed around, and it will be interesting to see what happens, but, however it turns out, Notre Dame fans had better hope that the next guy is one that can make them happy for a long time, because, right now, Irish eyes aren't smiling.

The Bone Head Call of the Week

I've thought for a while that LSU coach Les Miles was a dunderhead, and I have said so. Saturday, he went out of his way to prove it.

If you didn't see the loss to Mississippi, you missed some of the most inexplicable clock management ever committed by an alleged coach. It was so mind-bogglingly dumb, that it's hard to even explain.

With 1:17 remaining, LSU scored a touchdown to make it 25-23. The two point conversion failed, but the Tigers recovered the onside kick.

After completing a pass to the Rebel 32 yard line, LSU, almost unbelievably, went backwards 16 yards on the next three plays - an incomplete pass, a sack for a nine yard loss, and a screen pass that lost seven yards.

But here's the really unbelievable part. Facing a fourth and 26, coach Miles allowed 17 seconds to tick off the clock before somebody somwhere on the LSU sideline realized they hadn't managed to use their last timeout.

There were nine seconds left.

After the timeout, quarterback Jordan Jefferson miraculously completed a pass to Terrance Toliver at the Ole Miss five yard line. The first down momentarily stopped the clock, but, with no timeouts remaining, the Tigers scrambled to the line of scrimmage hoping to spike the ball and kick a field goal.

There was one second left.

A) You can't spike the ball with one second left.

B) If they hadn't allowed the 17 seconds to tick away earlier, there would have been plenty of time to line up, spike the ball, and kick the winning field goal.

At first, Miles said he "thought" they had called a timeout. Then, he admitted that he "didn't know what to do" after precious seconds had ticked away.

The game ended in pathetic confusion when the ball was whistled ready for play at the Rebel five, and the lonely second ticked away.

If anybody in Baton Rouge is wondering, I'd gladly take $3 million a year to stand on the sidelines looking like a deer in headlights.

I don't look good in purple and gold though...

My Crystal Ball Says...

2009-11-20T15:20:00.006-05:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

#25 California at #17 Stanford - Head coach Jim Harbaugh has Stanford playing with attitude.   They are getting a bit obnoxious about it too. It's kind of like the bratty little middle school kid down the street that starting taking steroids and working out, and showed up in high school ready to kick your ass. ESPN.com's Ted Miller says their style of play may even be going a bit beyond the rules. On his Pac 10 blog, he writes, "There are a few more pokes and grabs and punches in the pile-up and scrum at the line of scrimmage than in the past when Stanford suited up."  But nobody seems to care about that if your name isn't Brandon Spikes. Note to all the alleged experts who spent two weeks villifying Spikes: check Dictionary.com for the word "hypocrite" and then get back to me.  After scoring a total of 106 points in the last two games, Stanford has become the new favorite topic in the college football world. The fact that those points came against Oregon and USC makes it particularly intimidating, especially if you're a California team that managed only a field goal against both of those teams. The Golden Bears will be without running back Jahvid Best who is still out after suffering a concussion two weeks ago on one of the scariest plays of the year. Shane Vereen has been an adequate replacement for Best, but quarterback Kevin Riley is mistake-prone, and Cal's defense is lousy (71st in total defense). The Stanford offense has turned into a juggernaut behind Toby Gerhart, the nation's third leading rusher. All of this points to a Stanford win. And possibly a hefty dose of eye gouging. Fear the Tree.

#11 Oregon at Arizona - I've watched Arizona play once this year, in last week's loss at California, and I was not impressed. How this Wildcat squad managed to beat Oregon State and Stanford earlier in the year, I have no idea. Oregon is 6th in the nation in rushing offense, and LaMichael James has 100 or more yards rushing in each of the last five games. But Arizona is a respectable 21st in rushing defense.  Wildcat quarterback Nick Foles has somehow put up some decent numbers, but, to me, he is most notable for his Bonehead Play of the Week back in Week 6, Both teams are still alive in the Pac 10 race. Both need to win out. Arizona plays well at home - their three losses all came in road games - but I think the Ducks win the game, and also win the competition to see which team has the ugliest uniforms.

#8 LSU at Mississippi - For some reason, Mississippi seems to be a popular pick here. Even the oddsmakers in Vegas have the Rebels as a 4 point favorite. I don't get it. LSU may not be flashy, but they still have great athletes. Their only losses came at the hands of two of the top three teams in the land. One thing is certain; they will tackle Dexter McCluster better than Tennesee did. Speaking of Tennessee, have I mentioned recently that Lane Kiffin is not only a classless loudmouth, he's a lying classless loudmouth? I did? Good. Anyway, let me throw out some amazing statistics for you. LSU's offense may be rather pedestrian, but their defense has allowed only three rushing touchdowns this year. That ties them with Florida and Texas for tops in the nation in terms of fewest rushing touchdowns allowed.  And they continue to improve; they haven’t allowed a touchdown on the ground in their last six games. Also, it should be noted that LSU has prevailed in each of their last four trips to Oxford, which will mean absolutely nothing this Saturday, but it sounds like I know what I'm talking about when I say that. Or type it. Mississippi is a team that doesn't play well when saddled with expectations, and everyone seems to expect them to win this one. I don't. I think a healthy Jordan Jefferson at quarterback (he missed last week's game against Louisiana Tech with a sprained ankle) can avoid the Rebel pass rush, and I think the Tiger defense will return Jevan Snead to the state of mediocrity he was enjoying before the Tennessee defense rolled over for him. Speaking of Tennessee, have I mentioned that Lane Kiffin is a lying, classless loudmouth?

Kansas at #3 Texas - Mark Mangino is immense. What I mean to say is he's immensely proud of the turnaround he has managed at Kansas. A team that was a perennial doormat in the Big 12 suddenly found itself at 12-1 after the 2007 season, and proud owners of an Orange Bowl victory. And you better believe he is proud, or he will thump you in the chest, and berate you in front of your teammates. But, after a 5-0 start to this year, the Jayhawks have now lost five in a row, and, suddenly, they stink. A visit to Austin, Texas is not likely to provide a cure for stinking. The Longhorns have been, rather quietly, issuing a good old Southwest-style beatdown to everybody they have played. They continue on the collision course that, in all likelihood, has them meeting the winner of the SEC Championship game for all the marbles. Everybody knows about Texas QB Colt McCoy and his darling roommate Jordan Shipley. You probably don't know that Kansas signal caller Todd Reesing has some pretty respectable passing numbers too. It won't help. Kansas will continue to stink. And Texas will continue to issue good old Southwest-style beatdowns. At least until they play for all the marbles.

Florida International at #1 Florida - The key question in this game is, if you're Urban Meyer, how long do you leave Tim Tebow out there? You don't want him to spend an entire Saturday on the sidelines getting rusty when you have the Seminoles coming to town next week for a big rivalry game. But, let's face it, the Gators could probably win this game with me playing quarterback. Florida fans would like to see future star John Brantley get some work. Florida International is coming off a big win over the North Texas Mean Green and... Okay, okay. Forget the hype. This is likely to be horrible, one-sided game that will be about as interesting as watching paint dry. One thing I have learned is that, when I need something interesting to say, I find an obscure, but fascinating statistic.  The SEC blog on ESPN.com tells us, "The No. 1 team in the AP poll hasn't lost a November home game to a team with a losing record since 1961. That year, a 2-4-1 TCU team knocked off No. 1 Texas in Austin on Nov. 18." The FIU Panthers are 3-7, and not likely to add another footnote to the college football history books against the Gators this weekend.

Staying on Top is Harder Than You Think

2009-11-18T12:07:00.005-05:00

The world of college football is an unpredictable one. Scratching and clawing your way to the top - or near to it - is extremely difficult, and the stay there is often short-lived.

Consider the case of coach Bob Stoops and the Oklahoma Sooners.

At this point last year, the Sooners were 9-1. They had recovered from their loss at Texas on October 11, were ranked 5th in the BCS standings, and were awaiting a visit from second-ranked Texas Tech.

When the Sooners demolished the Red Radiers 65-21, they jumped Florida in the BCS, up to third.

The stage was set for a dramatic finish, and the Sooners capped the regular season with a 61-41 win over in-state rival Oklahoma State in Stillwater, and a 62-21 beating of Missouri in the Big 12 Championship game.

The Big 12 win gave Oklahoma enough extra weight in the computer rankings to pass Texas, and, when Florida knocked off top-ranked Alabama in the SEC Championship game, the Sooners found themselves at number one, waiting for an invitation to the national championship to arrive in the mail.

The offense had scored 702 points in 13 games - 54 points per game - and, appropriately, quarterback Sam Bradford won the Heisman Trophy.

Fast forward a year.

In the 2009 season opener, Oklahoma lost Sam Bradford to a shoulder injury, and lost a neutral site shocker to BYU, 14-13. Without Bradford, the offense appeared to be in neutral.

Wins over Idaho State and Tulsa restored some of the Sooner faith, but a 21-20 loss at Miami on October 3 made it clear that blocking was becoming an issue. Three starters from last year's championship offensive line had departed. By then, it was also clear that star tight end Jermaine Gresham's knee injury would sideline him for good.

With freshman Landry Jones at quarterback, Oklahoma managed a few more wins, lost a close one, 16-13, to Texas, and then arrived in Lincoln to play Nebraska on November 7. The offense that had scored more points than any other team in college football history in 2008 could manage only a measley field goal as the Sooners lost 10-3.

Oklaohoma is now 6-4, with games remaining at Texas Tech and at home against Oklahoma State. A 6-6 season is not beyond the realm of possibilities.

This is the reality of college football today. The loss of just a couple of key players can be the difference between dominating and self-destructing.

Most people know this intuitively - ask Florida fans how long they held their breath while Tim Tebow was sprawled motionless on the turf in Lexington - but seldom has it been as apparent as it is with this Sooner squad.

This is what makes Florida's achievements remarkable in this age of parity and unpredictability.

The Gators have now won 20 in a row. It is the nation's longest current winning streak, and includes a 24-14 upset of Oklahoma in last year's national championship game. They have a shot at back to back national championships. If they can keep winning.

It won't be easy. The Nebraska teams of 1994 and '95, the last back to back national champs - and the best college football teams I have ever seen in person - won 26 in a row before losing the second game of the '96 season at Arizona State.

While fans of the 10-0 Gators were admittedly nervous about Tebow's recovery, the really scary thing is knowing that Florida - like any great college team - is always just a couple of plays or a couple of players away from 6-6.

Upon Further Review (Week 11)

2009-11-17T13:10:00.033-05:00

Surrender. On Two. Ready. Break.

Some folks in Big Ten country want us to believe that Saturday's game between Iowa and Ohio State
proved that the Buckeyes are a worthy conference champion, and the Hawkeyes deserve an at-large BCS bowl bid.

I guess the Big Ten has to have some sort of champion. I don't know why they expect the rest of the college football world to care about a league that still hasn't figured out how many teams belong to it.

But an at-large BCS bid for Iowa? Seriously?

Saturday's game was a 27-24 affair, decided in overtime. While it sounds like it should have been exciting, it was most noteworthy for the fact that, once the score was tied at 24 late in regulation, neither team made a serious attempt to win.

Given the ball on their own 18 yard line with 2:37 remaining, Buckeye coach Jim Tressel managed to run five plays - three of them handoffs - to gain a grand total of 13 yards before punting to Iowa.

Then, Iowa, after fielding the punt, had the ball at their own 33 yard line with 52 seconds and two timeouts remaining. With a great opportunity to try to get into position for a game-winning field goal, Hawkeye coach Kirk Ferentz decided to run out the clock and hope for the best in overtime.

This was two teams playing not to lose. And it was truly pathetic.

Midwest football is about as exciting as boiled cabbage anyway, but this display of mediocrity prompted CBS Sports.com writer Gregg Doyel to suggest that the Big Ten banner should be a white flag.

Ohio State, by virtue of winning the league, will stumble into the Rose Bowl, and probably lose badly to whatever Pac 10 opponent they face. But do we really need to reward this Iowa team with a BCS bowl berth?

Let's examine their resume.

They beat Arizona 27-17 in Iowa City on September 19.

It seemed like a good win at the time. But the Wildcats are now 6-3, and they end the season with Oregon, at Arizona State and at USC. That looks like a 7-5 finish to me. Maybe.

The following week, Iowa beat Penn State 21-10 in Happy Valley.

Again, it seemed like a good win at the time. But let's tell it like it is. Joe Paterno has been a class act for his entire coaching career. He has kept the Penn State football program mostly clean while achieving frequent success on the field. In my view, he has earned the right to coach there until giant, hairy cockroaches take over the Earth, if that's what he chooses to do. But that doesn't, in any way, mean that this year's Penn State squad is good. Their most impressive win is over Temple. The Owls.

On October 17, the Hawkeyes beat Wisconsin.

They are a very respectable 8-2, but, upon closer examination, they lost to the only two ranked opponents they played. Translation: the Badgers are great in games that don't matter.

Otherwise, Iowa struggled with the likes of Northern Iowa (a 17-16 win) and Arkansas State (a 24-21 win).

So that brings us back to Saturday's game in Columbus. In a tie game, with the league title and its associated Rose Bowl berth on the line, Kirk Ferentz ordered his team to cower in the huddle and then take a knee.

In what was possibly the most appropriate ending for such a display of gutlessness, Iowa managed to lose 16 yards on their first three plays in overtime, and throw an interception on 4th and 26.

Ohio State took over and ran the ball three times, gaining three entire yards, before trotting the kicker on to the field for the game winner.

So Ohio State (9-2), with a game remaining at Michigan, managed to back into a Rose Bowl. And Iowa (9-2), with one game remaining against Minnesota, may have backed into a Fiesta Bowl simply by being the second least courageous team in the Big Ten.

It doesn't seem quite right.

There's a little part of me, though, that wants to see Iowa in the Fiesta Bowl against Boise State (10-0) - the scenario that seems most likely right now.

At least the Hawkeyes would find out what it's like to face a team that always plays to win.

Bulls in September. Puppies Afterward.

South Florida coach Jim Leavitt has a problem. He needs to find a way to make his players understand that the season lasts all the way through November. His teams have gained national recognition with fast starts, but also gained a reputation for slow finishes.

Since 2007, the Bulls are 13-0 in games played in September, but 11-13 in the rest of their games, including 6-10 in the month of October. And it's not because they've played nothing but patsies early in the year.

On Septmber 8, 2007, they won 26-23 at Auburn. On September 12 of last year, they beat a highly-regarded Kansas team in Tampa 37-34. This year, they beat Florida State 17-7 in Tallahassee on September 26.

But, after starting the season 5-0, they've now lost three of their last four, and Thursday's game against Rutgers was one of the worst performances I've ever seen from a college football team.

The Bulls (6-3) managed only 159 yards of total offense in the game, had four turnovers, and were totally overwhelmed by a Scarlet Knights team that really doesn't have many stars.

Afterward, Leavitt said, "They just beat the dog out of us."

With remaining games against Louisville, Miami, and at Connecticut, the Bulls are hoping there's at least a little dog left.

My Crystal Ball Says...

2009-11-13T01:51:00.021-05:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

#25 West Virginia at #5 Cincinnati - Like many college football fans, particularly those in SEC country, I am inclined to view any team from the league we jokingly call the Big Least as just another pretender. West Virginia (7-2) has a good running back in Noel Devine, but he sprained his ankle when the Mountaineers nipped Louisville 17-9 last week. Quarterback Jarrett Brown sprained his ankle too. That's not good news for a team that is 7-2, but hasn't managed to beat anybody that is actually good. It's hard to know what to think about Cincinnati (9-0). They are off to their best start since 1951, when they won nine straight games before losing to Xavier. I hate to get into comparative scores, but, this year, they hit the road and beat the same Oregon State team that has now beaten Stanford and Cal. Regular readers of this blog will know that I am a Mardy Gilyard fan, not just because he's a great receiver, but because, last year, he made one of the kindest gestures I've ever seen in a college football game. Here's the thing that really intrigues me. Quarterback Tony Pike opened the year putting up great numbers (128 of 199 passing for 1633 yards with 15 TD's and 3 INT's). Then he gets hurt, and sophomore Zach Collaros takes over and does even better (76 of 100 passing for 1229 yards with 10 TD's and 1 INT). That's truly remarkable. The Bearcats will win. Not necessarily because they are great, but because they are playing the Mountaineers. Another pretender from the Big Least.

#10 Iowa at #11 Ohio State - People in Big Ten country still believe that Iowa (9-1) has a chance of being an at-large BCS team after they lose to Ohio State (8-2). And they will lose to Ohio State, so that's not really the issue here. What concerns me is that a state that is well-known for the importance of its early primaries in presidential elections contains so many people who are apparently insane. The Hawkeyes managed to win their first nine games, but they barely scraped by so often that the question wasn't if they would lose, but when. In last week's loss to Northwestern, quarterback Ricky Stanzi injured his ankle badly enough that it required surgery. You might think that other stars on the team would pick up the slack, but they don't have any. So we're left with an Ohio State team that will clinch the Big Ten title Saturday when they beat Iowa. They're not going to play for the national championship, but they'll be in the Rose Bowl against the winner of the Pac 10. That's actually excellent news for Buckeyes fans who can comfort themselves with the knowledge that they won't have to sit through another beatdown at the hands of an SEC team.

Stanford at #9 USC - I don't like USC (7-2), and I'm glad to see them suffering through a season in which they have sustained two losses. So far. Of course, there are many teams that would like to "suffer" through such a season. The Trojans have won the last seven Pac 10 titles, but this year's crown is still up for grabs. They've also won 47 of their last 48 games at home. The lone loss in that stretch was Stanford's colossal upset in 2007, when they were 41 point underdogs. Quarterback Matt Barkley is talented, but sometimes plays like the freshman that he is. Last week at Arizona State, he completed just 7 of 22 passes, but the defense added a score on a pick six, and USC managed to win 14-9. Despite what the alleged experts keep telling us, the defense isn't up to the usual standards either. They are currently ranked 38th. Among the defenses ranked ahead of them... Duke. I'm not kidding. Stanford (6-3), meanwhile, looks more like a Big Ten team of old than a Pac 10 patsy. They have a strong offensive line, and a big, physical running back in the form of Toby Gerhart who is, rather quietly, the 2nd leading rusher in the nation. Stanford also has Andy Luck, an effective passer with better than average escapability and a great name. The alleged experts said Oregon couldn't just line up and run right through the Trojan defense two weeks ago. But they did. I think Stanford can do the same thing. If they can avoid a letdown after last week's shootout win over Oregon, the Cardinal will prevail again. Fear the Tree.

#16 Utah at #4 TCU - I've watched TCU (9-0) play a few times, and I'm convinced they are a well-coached team that can be competitive with anybody out there. They have competent running backs, an efficient passer in Andy Dalton, and a defense that ranks 3rd behind Texas and Florida. On top of that, Jeremy Kerley leads the Mountain West in kick returns and punt returns. Utah (8-1) holds a 5-1 edge in the series, and managed to ambush TCU 13-10 in Salt Lake City last year, but, this season, they haven't been as impressive as the 2008 squad that also ambushed Alabama in the Sugar Bowl. Since losing at Oregon in September, they've won six straight, and won nine of their last ten road games, dating back to last season. But they've also changed quarterbacks in mid-season, replacing struggling junior Terrance Cain with promising freshman Jordan Wynn. With the conference championship and a BCS bowl berth at stake, I think the Horned Frogs win convincingly.

#1 Florida at South Carolina - Every good Florida fan knows that there is always reason to fear the old Head Ball Coach. They remember all too well how South Carolina snuck up on the Gators, and scored a 30-22 win in Columbia in 2005, Urban Meyer's first year at Florida. And Spurrier has said that he will take more control over the play-calling Saturday in an effort to jump start his offense. They averaged just 12.3 points in the last four games, after averaging 27.3 in the first six. Quarterback Stephen Garcia is sharp at times, but inexplicably bone-headed at other times. They are still 19th in total defense, and should present a challenge for a Florida offense that is having a hard time making big plays. But, likewise, Florida's 2nd ranked defense should stifle the Gamecocks. Florida has already clinched the SEC's Eastern Division, and just needs to survive until the huge showdown with Alabama. Rainy weather could be a factor, but that should favor Florida and their ground game. When in doubt, I'll take any team with Superman at quarterback. This is one that will make their fans nervous for a while, but the Gators will win.

This week, My Crystal Ball Says... was brought to you by Campbell's Primordial Soup - "With You Since the Very Beginning"

For information on how you can sponsor this feature, please contact me at illegalprocedureblog@gmail.com.

Sneak Preview of Gators Uniform

2009-11-12T13:11:00.003-05:00

This is a sneak preview of the special Nike Pro Combat uniforms the Gators will wear in one of their remaining home games.

If I were a betting man, I'd guess it would be on November 28 against Florida State.

Nike T-shirts under the pads will bear the slogan, "Finish the Mission."

(Photo from Friends of the Program.net)

Moments in College Football History

2009-11-12T01:37:00.009-05:00

"If You're Smart, You'll Run"

In honor of Veteran's Day, I decided to revisit one of the most famous days, and one of the most famous players, in University of Illinois football history.

On October 17, 1924, the university held a ceremony to dedicate a brand new home for their football team. Illinois Memorial Stadium was named to honor citizens from that state who had died in World War I.

But it was October 18 that would prove to be a day to remember.

The Michigan Wolverines were in town for a huge clash between two teams who had finished the previous season unbeaten.

Awaiting the opening kickoff for Illinois was a junior named Harold "Red" Grange.

He returned it 95 yards for a touchdown.

He had shown great promise the year before, rushing for 723 yards and 12 touchdowns in just eight games, while helping the Illini finish unbeaten and win a national championship.

But on this one autumn day in Champaign, he became the toast of the college football world.

The opening kickoff return had shocked Michigan. They'd given up only four touchdowns in the previous two seasons combined. But before the first quarter was over, Grange would also have touchdown runs of 67, 56 and 44 yards.

Illinois coach Bob Zuppke rested his star in the second quarter (in those days, if you came out of a game, you couldn't go back in until the following quarter), but Grange took the field in the second half to run for a touchdown and pass for another.

By the time the game ended, Grange had rushed for 212 yards, passed for 64 yards, amassed 126 yards on kick returns, and was responsible for all six Illini touchdowns in a 39-14 victory.

It was one of the greatest single-game performances in the history of college football, and prompted Chicago American sportswriter Warren Brown to call Grange "the Galloping Ghost."

He went on to have a productive senior season at Illinois, and played several years in the fledgling National Football League, mostly with the Chicago Bears.

In 2007, when ESPN named their Top 25 Greatest Players in College Football, #1 was Red Grange.

When asked how he had managed to be such an elusive ball carrier, his answer was simple, "If you have the football and eleven guys are after you, if you're smart, you'll run."

Another Day, Another Gouge

2009-11-10T21:55:00.006-05:00

It will be interesting to see how the college football world reacts to the news that eye gouging and dirty play isn't limited to someone named Brandon Spikes.

While reviewing video of a play during which a Florida State fumble was recovered by Clemson, someone on Tomahawk Nation.com, an FSU fan site, noticed that Tiger defensive end Andre Branch (#40 in orange in the video below) doing some gouging of his own on Seminole guard David Spurlock (#79 in white).

Watch carefully to the left of the fumble action...

For every alleged expert who claimed to be surprised and offended that such behavior occurs on the field, what are you going to say now? Shouldn't you be just as surprised and offended at this? Or does it only matter when it's one of the best defenders in the country on the nation's number one team?

I'm not saying this kind of thing is pretty, and I'm not saying it should be condoned, but if you are aren't willing to openly admit that it is relatively commonplace, you don't know the game well enough to have any credibility with me.

Let me ask you a question. Do you think the plastic visors that some players fasten to their facemasks are there to help them see?

It only takes a few minutes of searching before you find examples like the video below. It's Ohio State linebacker Curtis Terry (#55 in white) giving Florida's Tim Tebow a one-two punch before stepping on him. All of this while Tebow is laying on the ground. Why do you think Tebow wanted so badly to score that last touchdown in the BCS Championship Game after the 2006 season?

I assume the alleged experts will climb back on their high horses, and demand that Andre Branch be suspended. And he should be. For now, it's in the hands of Clemson coach Dabo Swinney.

But I hope they don't pretend that this is a sudden "rash" of bad behavior that was rare until recently.

One thing is certain. When I watch college football on television this weekend, I will do so the way I have always done it. With the sound turned down.

Silly Video of the Week

2009-11-10T13:05:00.003-05:00

New York Jets rookie quarterback Mark Sanchez apparently agrees with my philosophy; sometimes, when you're at a game, you just need a snack...

Ponder This

2009-11-10T13:02:00.004-05:00

After throwing an interception to DeAndre McDaniel in the 40-24 loss to Clemson, Florida State quarterback Christian Ponder went to make the tackle, only he ended up being the one that got drilled.

Ponder suffered a separated shoulder on the play. The injury will apparently require surgery, and has put an end to this season for a player who was one of the few bright spots on the Seminole offense.

Changes

2009-11-10T11:23:00.005-05:00

I made a few changes to the format of this blog.

There is a built-in stat counter that tells me I had 457 unique visitors in the month of October, up from 171 in September. So I figured I should continue in an attempt to upgrade and vary my offerings, and make the Illegal Procedure experience as enjoyable as possible for as many people as possible, myself included.

I moved a few things around. I left the Useful Links where they were because, if you are a college football fan, they are genuinely useful. I frequently refer to those same sources when I am thinking, writing or just goofing off.

I'm going to try to do at least one semi-serious feature each week. You have seen some already - Moments in College Football History, for example. I will continue to look for tidbits on football technology as well as the technology involved in broadcasting football (see the First Down - Yellow Line Technology below). And I will occasionally try to find information on football strategy. I'll call it X's and O's.
I added a College Football News feed on the right. So far, I'm not terribly impressed, but we'll see how it goes. Any feedback you have would be appreciated.

I also added a new section with links to some College Football Blogs from newspapers around the country. I think you'll be surprised how much the viewpoints differ from region to region. It's interesting to see.

Right now, I only have a few, so, if you have any favorites from the New England area, or the Pacific Northwest, let me know. I'm still looking.

When I was in Washington, D.C. over the summer, I developed a fondness for the Washington Post online, but most of their college football coverage centers on the University of Maryland (currently 2-7) or the University of Virginia (currently 3-6), and reading about them is kind of like reading the obituaries; the only good news is that you can be happy you're not in their place.

I would like to point out that Jenni Carlson is the writer from the Daily Oklahoman whose coverage of Oklahoma State in 2007 was responsible for one of the more famous coaching tirades in recent college football history. Cowboy coach Mike Gundy is clearly directing his comments at one person in the room.

If you haven't seen Gundy's "I'm a Man, I'm 40" tirade, I highly recommend it...

So far, my initial impression of Carlson's stuff is that she will eventually annoy me almost as much as she annoyed coach Gundy. But, in the meantime, enjoy.

I picked Mike Hlas from the Cedar Rapids Gazette because, if he is any indication, living in the midst of thousands of square miles of cornfields apparently gives you a different perspective on things. There seems to be very little need for reality-based thinking when you are one of the Children of the Corn.

And I picked The Quad from the New York Times because they seem to be reasonably fair. I can't tell if they are entirely unbiased or just entirely disconnected from everything that happens outside of the boroughs of the Big Apple.

That's it for now!

First Down - Yellow Line Technology

2009-11-10T00:57:00.003-05:00

I thought this might be interesting for the gadget lovers out there, as well as the technologically challenged.

Do you know how they make the yellow first down lines appear on the field during telecasts of football games?

It's not as simple as you might expect. Watch:

Upon Further Further Review (Week 10)

2009-11-09T17:02:00.019-05:00

This week, the usual Monday feature is called Upon Further Further Review because, even with the help of video replay officials, college football referees can't seem to get it right...

ConCussed

If you have yet to see this fairly horrifying video of California's Jahvid Best going airborne for a touchdown against Oregon State, and landing on his head, it is not for the faint of heart.

Later, it was revealed that Best had missed two days of practice during the week because of a slight concussion suffered in the win at Arizona State.

While I am glad that it appears Best will be fine, what I want to know is where are all of the alleged experts who were ready to crucify Urban Meyer if Tim Tebow had emerged from the LSU game with anything more than a hangnail?

Why aren't they upset about this?

Irish Bad. Wolverines Worse

Way back in September, after Michigan's exciting win over Notre Dame, many of the alleged experts wanted us to believe that both of these traditional powers had returned to their rightful place of national prominence.

The day after the game, ESPN.com's Big Ten blogger Adam Rittenberg titled his entry "Michigan is back."

CBSSports.com's Gregg Doyel drooled, "...for close to four hours Saturday, Notre Dame and Michigan mattered again. And you might want to get used to it. Because they're back."

I thought they were wrong at the time, and I said so.

I'm wondering how they feel now.

Saturday, Notre Dame lost at home to Navy to fall to 6-3, and has games remaining at #12 Pittsburgh, against Connecticut, and at Stanford. And that Stanford game is looking tougher and tougher.

Michigan just lost at home to Purdue to fall to 5-5, and they're in the midst of a three game losing streak. They finish at #20 Wisconsin, and at home against #11 Ohio State.

Both coaches may be on the hot seat. And, in the case of Charlie Weis, that's a big seat.

Temple Strikes Gold(en)

Despite the incredibly stupid piece of propaganda included here, Temple coach Al Golden has to be a unanimous choice for Coach of the Year, doesn't he?

In the three years before Golden arrived in Philly, the Owls were 3-31.

Now, at 7-2, they are bowl-eligible for the first time since 1990. They haven't actually been to a bowl since 1979, when they beat California in the Garden State Bowl to finish 10-2.

If they win out, they will be the champions of the East Division of the MAC, and earn a berth in the league championship game.

Their last three games: at Akron, Kent State, at Ohio.

The problem: they average 16,646 fans at their home games. Bowl games aren't terribly inclined to invite a team that's going to leave a bunch of seats empty.

Okay, I Was Possibly Not Correct

I would like to apologize to anyone who read some of the things I've written and, from that, gotten the impression that I thought Penn State was a good team. I had that impression, but I was possibly... not correct.

Penn State is 8-2, but they have beaten a grand total of three teams that have winning records. Two of those teams were Temple and Eastern Illinois.

Given two chances to prove they can compete with the pack leaders in the Big Ten, they choked horribly. And both of those occasions were at home.

First, they were manhandled by Iowa in a 21-10 loss that wasn't as close as the score might indicate. Then came Saturday's 24-7 bludgeoning by an Ohio State team that has looked remarkably average until now.

There's always a temptation to think that Joe Pa is going to field a quality team, but, while this year's Nittany Lions will finish with a decent won-loss record, it's mostly because they've played a weak schedule.

My Crystal Ball Says...

2009-11-05T21:25:00.036-05:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

Florida State at Clemson - For last week's Homecoming game against NC State, 13,000 Florida State (4-4) fans showed their loyalty by coming to the game disguised as empty seats - their worst home crowd since 1993 - when, oh, by the way, they won a national championship. I can say it here because it's my blog. They are the worst fans ever. Ever. And it turned out to be an exciting game that illustrated what's wrong with FSU this year. They beat the Wolfpack 45-42, thus showing that they can score points in droves, but have a hard time stopping other teams from scoring. QB Christian Ponder has quietly become the 5th ranked passer in the nation in terms of completions per game. It's been hard to notice when their defense is ranked 109th. Meanwhile, Clemson (5-3) running back CJ Spiller has emerged as a Heisman Trophy candidate by doing everything except filling the Gatorade coolers. So, you might wonder how Florida State can beat Clemson in Death Valley. The answer is simple. They can't.

#16 Ohio State at #11 Penn State - This game is kind of flying under the radar now that each and every one of the three people who still think the Big Ten is a good football league is hot to trot for Iowa - the one team that hasn't lost a game, even though they keep trying. There are rumblings from the fans in Columbus that the coaching staff hasn't used their talent wisely, and hasn't developed the abilities of QB Terrelle Pryor. Despite the fact that Ohio State (7-2) hasn't beaten anybody good, they are still ranked 16th for some unknown reason, and can still win the Big Ten if they beat Penn State (8-1), and win the rest of their games. Uh huh. Right. Penn State is having a normal Joe Paterno kind of year. There is nothing at all flashy about them, but they pile up wins like I pile up laundry in my closet. Daryll Clark is a solid performer at quarterback, and their running game, led by Evan Royster, is productive. Still, I think you can argue that the Nittany Lions haven't beaten anybody good either. Iowa (if you want to say they are good) came to town and dominated every aspect of the game in a 21-10 win that wasn't that close. Paterno, unlike his counterpart at Ohio State, is clearly a coach who uses his talent wisely. I would say that a Penn State win means the Sweatervest Juggernaut stops here, but, in reality, it stopped a while ago.

#8 Oregon at Stanford - This has all the makings of a "trap" game for Oregon (7-1), doesn't it? They're coming off a 27 point thrashing of USC, and they've been on such a roll that it's tough to believe they can keep it going. Stanford, on the other hand, is 4-3, but all three losses have come on the road. And they've had a bye week to prepare. Oregon's option attack with Jeremiah Masoli and LaMichael James is potent. But Stanford has an old-school, physical ground game, and tailback Toby Gerhart is 7th in the nation in rushing. I don't know why, but I'm feeling the upset. Fear the Tree. Or the Cardinal.

#9 LSU at #3 Alabama - In three of the last four years, this game has pretty much decided which team won the SEC West. And these games have been the kind of tension-filled slugfests that make even the calmest of fans chew their fingernails to the bone. Last year, Alabama (8-0) won in overtime in Baton Rouge, 27-21. But LSU (7-1) has won in each of their last four visits to Tuscaloosa. In 2007, LSU scored with a minute and a half left to win 41-34. In 2005, LSU won 16-13 in overtime. The Tigers struggled offensively and defensively early in the year, but are improving on both sides of the ball. Alabama's defense is still a dominating force, but their offense lately has been more about field goals than touchdowns. Opposing teams know they can gang up on tailback Mark Ingram, and dare the Tide to win with QB Greg McElroy's arm. But I think Alabama's strong offensive line will give them an advantage over the LSU front seven, and the Tigers' nearly non-existent pass rush - they are last in the league in sacks - may disappear entirely. If LSU quarterback Jordan Jefferson does a great job getting the ball to his big receivers, this game could be another classic. But I like Nick Saban's chances of guiding Alabama to a home win with defense, field position, a solid ground game, and some efficient passing from McElroy.

Vanderbilt at #1 Florida - Head coach Bobby Johnson has done about as good a job as you can do when you're the football coach at Vanderbilt (2-7). Last year, he took them to a bowl game for the first time since Ronald Reagan was president. And we're talking the first term here. But this year, the Commodores' ship is taking on water. They managed to beat Western Carolina and Rice - two teams who have combined to amass one win this year. All week long, Gator haters and SEC critics everywhere have been making eye-gouging jokes. Funny, huh? Brandon Spikes suspended himself for the second half of this game after his coach suspended him for the first half. You know what? It won't matter. Spikes will still be a first round draft pick, and the Gators (8-0) will gouge the eyes (figuratively speaking) of the Commodores. Florida has won 18 straight against Vanderbilt. If last week's game against Georgia really did wake the Gator offense from its slumber, the rest of the nation should be afraid. Very afraid.

Silly Video of the Week

2009-11-05T18:20:00.001-05:00

Pigeon Power

The Raiders had good coverage on this kickoff to the Eagles, thanks to the power of the pigeon...

Upon Further Review (Week 9)

2009-11-03T21:10:00.018-05:00

A Little Evil in Us All

I will assume, if you are a college football fan, that you have seen the video of Florida's Brandon Spikes digging into the facemask of a Georgia player during Saturday's game.

I'm not going to defend his actions. He was wrong. He has apologized, and been suspended for the first half of this Saturday's game against Vanderbilt.

But I do want to point out the hypocrisy of sports writers and broadcasters who called for his punishment to be more severe.

A 4-3 Georgia team against unbeaten and top-ranked Florida still makes for an appealing TV game because everybody knows that the emotions involved can can make things interesting. Part of the intrigue in rivalry games is the long and bitter history that often includes shocking victories, painful defeats, and, sometimes, controversial events.

When you, as a writer or talking head, are among the folks who fan the flames of that history, and spend the entire week leading up to the game repeatedly reminding everyone about the recent bad blood between the teams - Georgia's endzone celebration in 2007 and Florida's late timeouts last year - you can not then pretend to be shocked and offended when those feelings manifest themselves on the field.

In many of these games, things get ugly in the scrum at the end of a play. Fingers are twisted, punches are thrown at sensitive body parts, and allegations are made about some of your closest family members. It has been part of the game from the beginning, when mass formations and brutal gang tackling were commonplace, and "slugging" was not unusual.

The NCAA traces its own beginning to 1905 when scores of injuries and deaths on the football field caused Teddy Roosevelt to call for rule reforms to calm the "rugged nature" of the game.

Television hosts joyfully revisit highlights when someone gets "jacked up" but would rather pretend that petty scores aren't sometimes settled at the bottom of a pile. Moments like that happen in every game. Every game. The only difference is that this moment ended up on YouTube.

Did any of the alleged journalists who suddenly viewed themselves as the social conscience of the game, and argued for a harsher penalty on Spikes, bother to recall the circumstances of the five personal foul penalties that were called?

Did any of them listen afterward when even Georgia coach Mark Richt admitted that there was a play when Brandon Spikes "got hit with his helmet off?"

Did any of them notice that, at one point, Tim Tebow had shuffled blindly to the Florida sideline to receive first aid on his eyes?

Did any of them bother to watch the game tape even after Tebow said, "I don't think we did anything in that game that they didn't do. You can see it on film?"

Of course not. There's no time for that when when you're busy being self-righteous.

Fortunately, the furor subsided when the voice of reason appeared, oddly enough, in the form of Georgia running back Washaun Ealey, the gouging victim himself.

Ealey didn't think Spikes should be suspended for something like that. "I'm pretty sure it goes on back and forth," he said. "We probably do it and other teams do too. It's all football."

And there it was. He called the bluff. He brought attention to the one thing everyone tries to avoid seeing.

It's all football.

Maybe that's one of the reasons we enjoy it. Maybe there's a little evil in us all.

After Ealey's statement, the indignation among sports writers and broadcasters dried up as quickly as it had appeared. For many alleged journalists, suddenly, sitting in the saddle of their high horse wasn't such a comfortable place to be.

"Fat Little Girlfriends" to Blame for Texas Tech Loss

In case you missed it, Texas Tech was pretty terrible in their loss to Texas A&M on October 24. Red Raider coach Mike Leach had an interesting theory about how that happened. I had to watch this three times before I could make myself believe that he actually said what he did.

Umm. Yeah...

My Crystal Ball Says...

2009-10-29T20:16:00.018-04:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

Central Michigan at Boston College - I like Central Michigan. Every time I think of them, I am reminded of the great Gordon Lightfoot song The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald. "The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down..." I love that song. These Chippewas probably have the best quarterback you've never heard of. Dan LeFevour is 12th in the nation in passing efficiency, which puts him ahead of better-known names like Houston's Case Keenum, and USC's Matt Barkley. The biggest improvement for Central Michigan this year has come on defense. After allowing 30 points per game last year, this season they are allowing just 15. Their only loss on the way to a 7-1 record came in the season opener at Arizona. Boston College brings a 5-3 record into the game. Their signature win is a 7 point upset of an inconsistent Florida State team, and they are coming off a disappointing finish in last week's 20-16 loss at Notre Dame. The Chippewa strategy should be obvious; stop the BC running game, and force Eagle QB Dave Shinskie to make plays. Shinskie has been shaky at times. He threw for 279 yards against the Irish, but also threw 3 interceptions. When the "gales of November came early" Chestnut Hill has been a tough place to win. But Saturday's forecast calls for a crisp, sunny day. This would be a huge win for the Chippewas, and, if they can get an early lead, I think they'll pull off the upset.

Louisiana Tech at Idaho - It turns out that Idaho has more than just potatoes. They also have a pretty good football team. Since I'm officially on their bandwagon now, I thought I'd feature one of their games here. When the Vandals (I love that name) reached the 6 win mark two weeks ago, they had already doubled their win total of the last two seasons combined. Now that they are bowl-eligible, and with games against Fresno State and Boise State still to come, Idaho needs this win to continue to improve their bowl status. Head coach Robb Akey has changed the attitude in Moscow, and the Vandals (6-2) have demonstrated some previously untapped toughness; they are 3-0 in games decided by 4 points or less. Louisiana Tech (3-4), on the other hand, is just not very good. They are coached by Derek Dooley, son of legendary coach Vince Dooley. In some strange way, Derek's struggles in Ruston seem to be payback for all the years of suffering his dad caused me when he coached at Georgia. What are the odds that father and son would both coach at schools whose mascot is Bulldogs? This Saturday, the suffering will continue, as the
Vandals sack this pack of Bulldogs.

#22 South Carolina at Tennessee - This should be a really interesting game. Both teams have good defenses and sketchy offenses. The Volunteer defense hasn't surrendered an offensive touchdown since the 4th quarter of the Auburn game - two games ago. The Gamecocks (6-2) are the worst team in the SEC in pass protection - having allowed 22 sacks, but the Vols haven't had a sack in 4 games now. Gamecock freshman receiver Alshon Jeffery has had a busy month - he has 21 receptions for 414 yards and five touchdowns in the last 4 games. Both quarterbacks are inconsistent. When SC's Stephen Garcia and UT's Jonathon Crompton are good, they can be really good. When they are bad, they look like Pop Warner kids trying to play with the big boys. Despite all the bluster from loudmouth coach Lane Kiffin, Tennessee is 3-4. One thing Loudmouth Lane will find out eventually is that there are certain people in the SEC you just don't want to aggravate. Steve Spurrier is one of those people. When he holds a grudge, it's forever. I think Tennessee gave a great effort against Alabama last week, so much so that I don't think they can do it again this week. I have a feeling the Gamecocks will pull the upset, and, afterward, Spurrier will provide the college football world with one of those stinging verbal barbs for which he is (in)famous.

#5 USC at #10 Oregon - Something about USC (6-1) always makes me root against them. I'm not sure what it is. For one thing, you'd have a hard time convincing me that Reggie Bush is the only player they ever paid, but that's another story. I was nearly delirious when the Trojans choked in Seattle. Now they have a chance to do it in Eugene. Something about the Pacific Northwest... Tight end Anthony McCoy has become one of Matt Barkley's favorite targets, but he has a sprained ankle, and probably won't play. Everyone wants to tell me how good USC's defense is. You know where they rank nationally? They are 16th. That's definitely good. You know who is ranked ahead of them? Army (15th in total defense). Still scared? Meanwhile, since the season-opening beatdown by Boise State, Oregon (6-1) has been unbeatable. Literally. QB Jeremiah Masoli has been on fire, although hobbled by a lingering knee injury. The Duck defense has chipped in too, forcing 19 turnovers, which ties them for tops in the Pac 10 in that category. Sportswriters like ESPN's Ted Miller tell us that Oregon can't possibly line up and run right at USC. I think they can. And they will.

#1 Florida vs Georgia (in Jacksonville) - If you've never been to the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, or don't know much about it, the depth of the passion is hard to understand. Earlier this week, Georgia (4-3) linebacker Rennie Curran may have said it best, "The hatred is already there with the fans, the coaches, everyone. There's no other way to put it: We just don't like each other." It is one of the nation's most bitter and most entertaining rivalries. When Spurrier arrived at Florida (7-0) in 1990, he knew very well about some of the pain and suffering the Dawgs had inflicted on the Gators. And he holds a grudge. He started a trend that has seen Florida win 16 of the last 19 meetings, and the Gators have inflicted some pain and suffering of their own. In 2002, the loss to Florida was the only thing that kept the otherwise unbeaten Bulldogs from playing for the national championship. This year, the analysis is simple. The instant that Florida takes the lead, they can start to feel comfortable. If the lead gets to double digits, the game is over. Georgia will not score on the nation's best defense, and Florida's offense is like a trap waiting to be sprung. When it breaks loose, it's going to be a thing of beauty. Or it's going to be ugly. If you're a Dawg. Gators win.

Moments in College Football History

2009-10-28T11:53:00.019-04:00

Run, Lindsay, Run

The last Saturday in October is the traditional day for the famous, neutral site Florida-Georgia game known as the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party.

[I am using the traditional name for the game, despite the wishes of the current presidents of the respective universities, both of whom would rather pretend that calling it something else will somehow miraculously cause fans to curtail their game-related festivities. Note to Bernie Machen (UF) and Michael Adams (UGA): Everybody but you thinks your idea is really dumb.]

This rivalry has given the college football world many notable moments over the years, but, none, perhaps, as memorable as "Run, Lindsay, Run."

Leading up to the game in 1980, Georgia had been carried by the legs of a freshman tailback named Herschel Walker to an 8-0 record and a #2 ranking.

The Gators had ridden the arm of freshman quarterback Wayne Peace in a wide open offense (the "Run and Shoot") installed by first year coordinator Mike Shanahan, then 28 years old. Florida had fought their way to a 6-1 record, but was still recovering from the debacle that was the 0-10-1 season in 1979.

Against the Gators, Walker had another terrific day, carrying the ball 37 times for 238 yards. But Florida scratched and clawed, and, somehow, led 21-20 when they punted the ball inside the Georgia 9 yard line with 1:35 remaining.

Tension had built in the stadium during the afternoon as the public address announcer updated the crowd on the score of the Georgia Tech - Notre Dame game. The Irish were unbeaten, and ranked #1. A Notre Dame loss, combined with a Georgia win, would move the Bulldogs into the top spot.

Facing a 3rd and 11 from their own 8 yard line with 1:08 to play, an obvious passing situation, Georgia quarterback Buck Belue took the snap and dropped back.

Bear in mind that, when you have a running back like Herschel Walker, you don't pass much. You don't have to. At that point, Belue had attempted 15 passes in the game, and completed just 6. He'd been intercepted twice.

Peace, by comparison, completed 20 of 37 passes for 286 yards and a touchdown.

Belue, under pressure in his own endzone, spotted Bulldog receiver Chuck Jones deep down the field. He was covered. In desperation, Belue rolled to his right, and heaved the ball to Lindsay Scott, who had briefly broken open at the Georgia 25.

The video here is accompanied by the play-by-play description of the legendary Voice of the Bulldogs Larry Munson. I urge you to listen to the audio in its entirety...

After 92 yards, Lindsay Scott flashed across the goal line for the winning score. Georgia 26. Florida 21.

Georgia Tech and Notre Dame tied 3-3 that day, and Georgia claimed the top spot in the poll.

The Bulldogs went on to beat Notre Dame in the Sugar Bowl, and win a national championship, their 12-0 record preserved by the improbable combination of Buck Belue to Lindsay Scott.

Upon Further Review (Week 8)

2009-10-27T10:42:00.020-04:00

Congratulations to Tarheel Fans

I would like to take a moment to congratulate the football fans at the University of North Carolina for accomplishing something I thought was absolutely impossible.

During Thursday night's game against Florida State, you spent so much time booing that you actually made me want to root for the Seminoles.

I thought Tennessee fans were bad.

You were lousy fans when your team was ahead, and even lousier fans when your team choked on national television, and lost 30-27 after leading 24-6. Boooo.

I can only imagine how much you pout about the powder blue during basketball season. All I can say is... go Blue Devils.

I'm on the Wagon

I don't like bandwagon fans. Seriously. Have some loyalty. Have some conviction. Have some consistency. Don't just change your allegiances when it's convenient.

Having said that, I would like to announce that I am jumping on two different bandwagons right now, but, rest assured, I'm doing it for the right reasons.

I am now officially a University of Richmond fan. I will admit it openly, and without shame. And I will tell you that I became a fan just because I think their helmets are really, really cool.

The fact that Richmond opened the season with a win at Duke, and are now 7-0 and atop the FCS (Division I-AA) polls doesn't hurt.

The Richmond Spiders. I am now on the wagon.

Idaho first caught my attention because, come on, you have to like any team called the Vandals.

I bought a hat. Then a T-shirt. I wear them both often.

But this year, there's even a nice little story in Moscow (Idaho).

After winning just 3 games in the previous two seasons combined under coach Robb Akey, the Vandals are 6-2 this year, and already bowl eligible. Granted, they got smashed 70-45 by Nevada on Saturday, but I think they'll finish the season 8-4, and get a nice bowl trip as a reward.

The Idaho Vandals. I am now on the wagon.

Hold the Hype

Is there anybody else out there who thinks that it's still too early to hype anybody for the Heisman?

This season, the race is wide open. So let's leave the conjecture aside for a couple more weeks, and see what happens.

Some of the early alleged favorites are struggling, while other strong candidates are emerging.

The award is supposed to be based on a player's performance during the entire season, right? Not just their performance in September and October. There are still big games left to be played, and conference races to be decided.

For some reason, there is a tendency among the Heisman voters to make up their minds early, and then spend the rest of the season defending their choice like it was the Alamo.

In past years, some Heisman ballots have been mailed in before the conference championship games have been played. How can anybody do that if they take their voting role seriously? Ballots received before the end of the season should be discarded, and that voter should lose the right to participate further.

Hold the hype. Watch and enjoy. It's college football. The season will be over soon enough. Why rush it?

One of Them Had to Win

The tension must have been nearly unbearable Saturday when Ball State visited Eastern Michigan. Coming into the game, Ball State was 0-7, and Eastern Michigan 0-6. Talk about two teams badly in need of a win...

The Cardinals' running backs must have been inspired.

Cory Sykes had 23 carries for 203 yards and three touchdowns. Not to be outdone, MiQuale Lewis carried the ball 26 times for a career-high 301 yards and a touchdown.

Ball State won, 29-27.

As a reward, they get to host Ohio this weekend, while still-winless Eastern Michigan visits Arkansas. Ouch.

My Crystal Ball Says...

2009-10-22T22:03:00.025-04:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

Some of you may have noticed that I didn't post the visions provided by My Crystal Ball last week.

The sponsor backed out at the last minute, so the hundreds of dollars I would have made while typing suddenly dried up.

So I said, "The hell with it." And I drank beer instead.

This week, you get a slightly expanded version of My Crystal Ball, brought to you by new Honey Roasted Buffalo Chips.

They told me the check was in the mail. I swear.

Tennessee at #2 Alabama - I'm already tired of hearing about Mark Ingram, but I guess it's understandable for a guy who's leading the nation in rushing. Wait. What did you say? He's not leading the nation? He's 4th? Behind Ryan Mathews of Fresno State, Darius Marshall of Marshall and Dion Lewis of Pittsburgh? So why haven't I heard of those guys? I don't understand it either. Clearly, Ingram must have dominated Tennessee last year, right? Well, no... 4 carries for 1 yard. Despite what the alleged experts tell you, Alabama is not unbeatable. They struggled with Kentucky before the Wildcats self-destructed with 5 turnovers, and they managed one whopping offensive touchdown in last week's win over the Gamecocks. Tennessee has a decent running back of their own, Montario Hardesty (who, by the way, averages just 17 yards per game less than Ingram), and their defense is good enough to keep this game close. The key to this game is their quarterback, Jonathan Crompton. He had his first great great game of the year two weeks ago when the Vols trounced Georgia 45-19. If he has two great games in a row, the Vols win.

#8 TCU at #16 BYU - This is a huge game between two teams that most of the nation never watches. TCU is 4th in the nation in total defense. BYU is 6th in scoring. Something's got to give. It's Gary Patterson's 10th year at TCU, and it doesn't take long to notice that they are a well-coached team. They make few mistakes. They have a very good defense, a solid rushing attack, and a dependable quarterback. They are one of just seven teams who remain unbeaten. On the other sideline, if Bronco Mendenhall didn't coach, what else would he do? That's clearly the best name in football. It's worth noting here that BYU also has running backs named Unga and Tonga. I'm not kidding. In the name game, the Cougars win. "Quarterback U" has given the football world a steady stream of talent over the years - Gifford Nielsen, Marc Wilson, Jim McMahon, Steve Young, Robbie Bosco, Ty Detmer, etc. Max Hall is another good one. But, I have to tell you, I've seen Florida State play a few times, and I can not bring myself to pick a team that got pounded at home 54-28 by this year's Noles. TCU will use a handful of running backs to pound that Cougar defense, and then Andy Dalton will start tossing the ball over their heads. And, on second thought, BYU might not win the name game hands down. TCU trumps all by calling themselves the Horned Frogs.

Illinois at Purdue - In his famous book, Catch-22, Joseph Heller wrote, "Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them. With him it was all three." He wasn't writing about Ron Zook, but he could have been. He has a reputation as a great recruiter and a tireless worker, but he should abandon the sideline work on Saturdays to the cheerleaders. He's just not a guy who knows how to build team chemistry. I stumbled on the Fighting Illini Football page on Facebook, and discovered that their page administrator (an Illinois sports information employee) has been deleting all the negative comments from fans, and it's become nearly a full time job. I've read that rowdy fans in the stands at the last home game were telling recruits not to go there. It's that bad. Purdue's offense played reasonably well in a series of close losses before the defense finally chipped in and they sprung the trap on Ohio State last week. Running back Ralph Bolden is quietly putting up some decent numbers. Can the Boilermakers make it two wins in a row? Yes.

Auburn at #9 LSU - These two teams almost always play hard-hitting, entertaining games. If you've never watched a Tiger brawl, make an effort to find a TV at 7:30 Saturday night. Auburn started the year 5-0 under first year coach Gene Chizik, and everyone thought he had somehow worked a miracle. Then they ran into Arkansas and Kentucky teams badly in need of a win, and, suddenly, the Tigers are in the midst of a two game losing streak, and, well, badly in need of a win. Ben Tate and Onterio McCalebb average over 5 yards a carry, and Auburn has quietly risen to 8th in the nation in total offense, thanks to the strength of their running game. LSU seems to win with smoke and mirrors. They are loaded with talent on both sides of the ball, but, while the defense is decent, the offense is pitiful, currently 112th. QB Jordan Jefferson can throw the ball a mile, and Brandon LaFell and Terrance Toliver are big, tall receivers. If they ever get the passing game really working, it will be amazing. Still, they just keep finding ways to win games. It wouldn't take much to convince me that Les Miles is the luckiest coach in America. I think the Tigers get lucky again in this one. ;) The LSU Tigers.

#1 Florida at Mississippi State - Only two of Florida's six defenseive tackles are healthy right now. And LB Brandon Spikes is nursing a groin injury. This is not a good thing when you have to play a Mississippi State team that is 13th in the nation in rushing, and has a bruising back like Anthony Dixon (who, by the way, averages just 13 yards per game less than Alabama's Mark Ingram). First year coach Dan Mullen knows Urban Meyer well - until this year, they've coached together since 1999. Does this give the Bulldogs an advantage? Maybe. But, bear in mind that Meyer also knows Mullen well. The Bulldogs' problem has been consistency on offense, and a porous defense - currently 59th nationally. For some reason, Florida teams of the past seemed to sink into the Mississippi quagmire when they visited. The Gators have lost their last 4 in Starkeville, dating back to 1986. But this is not your father's Florida team (I can't believe I just typed that). With the offense still trying to find a steady rhythm, the defense has been dominating games for the Gators. I think Meyer will challenge his offense to step up and win one for his battered stop troops. When in doubt, take any team that has Tim Tebow at quarterback. I hope Florida wins easily so I can watch the LSU-Auburn game.

Gator Fans Grumbling. Again.

2009-10-22T13:07:00.027-04:00

Remember this from last year?

Or this?

These are silly things that fans sent to me as they expressed their displeasure with the Gator offense. It was right after the loss to Ole Miss, and suddenly every Joe Plumber on the street had become Bob Offensive Coordinator.

It's happening again.

In regular season games during the four previous years under Urban Meyer, the Gators are 18-2 against teams in the SEC East, and 6-6 against teams from the West. Florida always seems to have an ugly game against an SEC West opponent. Usually they lose that game.

But, this time, they won it.

Even after Tebow's famous "Promise" speech last year, Florida stumbled to a 17-7 lead at Arkansas, only to have the offense finally come alive in the 4th quarter - thanks to Chris Rainey and Jeff Demps - for a 38-7 final score.

Suddenly the stars shined brightly again, and the sun and sky had returned to their proper Orange and Blue alignment.

After last week's game, Tim Tebow was asked how he felt about the Gator offense up to this point, and he said, "I'm the quarterback of a team that's 6-0, and I'm pretty happy about that."

The question for Gator fans is why aren't you?

Stand up and scream like hell. Enjoy it. Because in this age of parity in college football, few teams will ever dominate the way Florida has recently.

The Gators have had a bulls eye on their back from the very first day of the season, more so than at any other time ever.

Do you remember who was #1 in the BCS Rankings at the end of the regular season last year? Alabama. Followed by Oklahoma, Texas and then Florida.

Do you know who was #1 going into the bowl game? Oklahoma. Florida had knocked off previously unbeaten and #1 Alabama in the SEC Championship game, and jumped Texas into the #2 spot while Oklahoma assumed the top ranking.

As much as it may be convenient to forget it, the Gators were the underdogs last year. This year, they are the hunted. They'll be expected to win big despite the fact that they're going to get everybody's best game.

Which leads me to Saturday's game against Mississippi State...

The Gators are winless in their last four trips to Starkeville dating back to 1986. Galen Hall lost there. Steve Spurrier lost there. Twice. Ron Zook lost there - the game that cost him his job.

If you've ever been to Starkeville, you understand how difficult it is to get motivated to do anything besides hurry to catch the first bus out of town.

Starkeville is a place that makes Gator fans nervous, and, this year, they are more nervous than ever.

Here are some things I've heard from grumbling Gators:

The offense is disappointing, if not downright terrible.

I'm going to give you two sets of passing numbers from the Arkansas game. You tell me which ones belonged to Ryan Mallett, and which ones belonged to Tim Tebow.

A) 12 completions on 27 attempts for 224 yards, 1 TD, no INT's

B) 17 completions on 26 attempts for 255 yards, 1 TD, no INT's

If you said the first set belonged to Tim Tebow, you are wrong. Despite all the hype about the Arkansas offense and Ryan Mallett's passing abilities, Tebow had a better day, statistically speaking.

It's not always a work of art, and they're not scoring points in bunches like they sometimes did last year, but Florida still leads the SEC in scoring offense, rushing offense and total offense, and they're fifth in passing offense.

The defense is disappointing, if not downright terrible.

There were some breakdowns against Arkansas, and the defense gave up some big plays, but Lawrence Marsh, Justin Trattou and Jermaine Cunningham played hurt, Brandon Spikes left the game very early with a groin injury, and did not return, and Jaye Howard didn't play.

Injuries will still be a key factor against the Bulldogs - several starters will again be hampered or miss the game entirely - but I expect the defense to play with more intensity against an offense that is still finding its way in the first year of a new system. The Arkansas offense was the best the Gators have seen up to this point, and may be the best they will see all year, at least until championship game and bowl time.

Florida still leads the nation in scoring defense, and is second in total defense and pass efficiency defense.

This is going to be a tough game because Bulldog coach Dan Mullen knows what we're going to do on offense.

Why look at it that way? Dan Mullen and Urban Meyer know each other well. Until this year, they had coached together since Mullen became a grad assistant at Notre Dame in 1999 when Meyer was the wide receivers coach. Don't you think Meyer also knows what Mullen is going to do? You know what they're saying in Starkeville? This is going to be a tough game because Urban Meyer knows what we're going to do on offense. Only they have better athletes and more of them.

I have a feeling that Florida's offense will play well in this game. I know the defense will. Something tells me this one won't even be close. But, even if it is, I'm willing to bet that the Gators will find a way to score more points than the other team.

On Sunday, Florida will be 7-0. And, despite the grumbling, I think Gator fans should feel pretty happy about that.

Moments in College Football History

2009-10-21T14:34:00.014-04:00

The Greatest Team Ever?

If someone asked you which college football team was the greatest ever, what would you say?

Army in 1945? Oklahoma in 1956? Alabama in 1961? Nebraska in 1971? USC in 1972?

What about Sewanee in 1899? They would get my vote.

A small Episcopal college located in the mountains of Tennessee about 50 miles west of Chattanooga, Sewanee, The University of the South began playing football in 1891. Having adopted royal purple as their color, "the Purple" (they later became the Tigers) may have been nursing an inferiority complex.

The 1899 squad thought they had something special, and set out to prove it to anyone who would pay attention.

Bear in mind this was back in the day when less scrupulous schools would pad their rosters with players who rarely attended class, or, in some cases, with players who never even enrolled.

But this Sewanee squad was rather unique. When they boarded a train for the Greatest Road Trip Ever, the 21 man roster included 4 theological students, 4 medical students and 5 law students.

Along with their coach, Billy Sutter, a student manager named Luke Lea, and a trainer, they traveled 2500 miles by rail, and played 5 games in 6 days.

Here are the results:

Nov. 9 (Thursday) at Austin.............Sewanee 12 Texas 0
Nov. 10 (Friday) at Houston.............Sewanee 10 Texas A&M 0
Nov. 11 (Saturday) at New Orleans.....Sewanee 23 Tulane 0
Nov. 13 (Monday) at Baton Rouge......Sewanee 34 LSU 0
Nov. 14 (Tuesday) at Memphis.........Sewanee 12 Ole Miss 0

They won all 5 games, against some of the most respected teams of the time, and didn't surrender a single point.

The 1899 Sewanee Purple went on to finish 12-0, and just to pad their resume, they also beat Georgia, Georgia Tech, Tennessee, Auburn and North Carolina.

Sewanee eventually joined the Southeastern Conference as a charter member in 1932, but, by then, had chosen to emphasize academics over athletics. They never won a game in the new league, and withdrew in 1940.

While they still compete in Division III (non-scholarship) football, they are most proud of the 25 Rhodes Scholars and dozens of Fulbright Scholars that have wandered their halls.

But when anyone asks me which was the greatest college football team of all time, there is no doubt in my mind.

Sewanee in 1899.

Upon Further Review (Week 7)

2009-10-19T19:11:00.034-04:00

Berry and Liquor Don't Mix

West Virginia defensive tackle Scooter Berry has been suspended indefinitely by head coach Bill Stewart after being arrested over the weekend for public intoxication and disorderly conduct.

Before this recent incident, Berry had started 25 games for the Mountaineers, and was among their most experienced players.

But he was probably best known for sitting next to teammate Johnny Dingle, and, thus, providing the college football world with one of the most entertaining photograph opportunities in recent history.

Ramblin' Wreckage

When Georgia Tech beat Virginia Tech on Saturday, fans of the Ramblin' Wreck stormed the field and turned the north endzone goalpost into Ramblin' Wreckage.

But leave it to the engineers to take it further.

They removed the gold-painted uprights from the stadium, and carried the Wreckage to the steps of Georgia Tech president G.P. Peterson's house, where they intended to leave it for him as a gift to commemorate the victory.

Being the kind-hearted engineers that they are, they first used a hacksaw to cut it into manageable pieces, then gently deposited the Wreckage before retiring to the nearest pub.

Speaking of Ramblin'

For some reason, a simple but noteworthy fact has gone largely un-noticed since Georgia Tech beat Virginia Tech.

Can you tell me how many passes Georgia Tech completed in the winning effort? Go ahead, think. I'll wait.

The answer is... 1. Yellow Jacket QB Josh Nesbitt attempted 7 passes in the game and completed 1 while beating the fourth ranked team in the nation. Granted, that pass went for 51 yards, but Nesbitt carried the ball 23 times for 122 yards and 3 touchdowns. Couple that with Jonathan Dwyer's 20 carries for 82 yards, and you have the makings of a Hokie-whipping.

So what's the point, you ask? The point is that there are times in college football when you can forget everything the alleged experts say. They will talk about offensive balance, keeping the defense guessing, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But, when it comes right down to it, good teams will find something that works, and keep doing it. At least until the other team stops it. It doesn't have to be pretty. It doesn't even have to be logical. You just have to find a way to score more points than the other team.

That is one of the things that make college football so great. Every game is different, every matchup is different, and, on any day, it's anyone's game if things go your way. If you don't think that's true, explain this: Miami beat Georgia Tech 33-17, Virginia Tech beat Miami 31-7, and Georgia Tech beat Virginia Tech 28-23.

So which is the best team in the ACC? I have absolutely no idea...

Silly Video of the Week

2009-10-14T09:18:00.003-04:00

This is a bit silly. It's also AWESOME...

Upon Further Review (Week 6)

2009-10-12T21:11:00.025-04:00

How to Get the Call

In the game of football, referees reign supreme. In theory, they are there to make sure both teams play by the rules. While some penalty calls are cut and dried, others depend on the "judgment" of the official.

As we have often seen, the decisions they make can directly affect the outcome of a game.

This is where the head coaches come in. While prowling the sidelines, coaches will try different approaches to get the officials to see things their way.

Some coaches play buddy-buddy, while others try to intimidate. Some coaches appeal to the referee's sense of fairness, while others simply beg.

In case you were wondering which approach LSU coach Les Miles uses, well, the mystery ends here.

(Photo courtesy of the Associated Press)

How About a Nice Big Bear(cat) Hug?

There are 9 unbeaten teams remaining in the FBS (Division I-A). Can you name them?

Come on. The first few are easy. Florida, Alabama, Texas, and Boise State. From there it gets a little tougher... Iowa, TCU, and Kansas.

The last two play each other Thursday night when South Florida hosts Cincinnati. Yep. South Florida and Cincinnati.

The Bearcats have slowly climbed to number 8 in the AP poll. They have a quarterback who is quietly piling up some great numbers. Tony Pike has completed 116 of his 174 pass attempts for 1493 yards with 13 touchdowns and just 3 interceptions. He is starting to appear on some Heisman Watch lists.

My favorite Bearcat is wide receiver Mardy Gilyard. He's having a great senior year. In five games he has 38 catches for
517 yards and 7 touchdowns. That means he's on pace to have 91 receptions in the regular season. Not bad.

But if you are a faithful reader of Illegal Procedure, you might remember that, in last year's game against South Florida, Mardy Gilyard gave the world one of the most sincere and heartwarming moments of kindness I have ever witnessed in a college football game.

After sprinting through the endzone in an attempt to catch an overthrown pass, his momentum carried him into the stands where he crashed into a young boy. The aftermath was captured by ESPN cameras...

I don't know how good Cincinnati really is. But I know that I am a Mardy Gilyard fan for life.

The Bone Head Call of the Week

Arizona quarterback Nick Foles had a respectable passing night against Washington on Saturday. He finished with 39 completions on 54 attempts for 384 yards.

The Wildcats had surged to a 33-21 lead with 4:16 left in the game. Normally, it's pretty hard to screw that up.

Normally.

With help from a personal foul penalty, Washington was able to charge down the field for a touchdown at the 2:55 mark. Arizona still ahead 33-28.

With two timeouts left, Washington opted to kick deep and play defense.

After a nice return, Arizona started on their own 37 yard line with 2:49 on the clock. On first down, Arizona offensive coordinator Sonny Dykes called a play that head coach Mike Stoops later said was a "run-pass option."

Here is what I want to know: WHY?

Any idiot can figure out that three handoffs and a punt - with Washington burning its timeouts in between - will leave the Huskies pinned deep in their own end needing a touchdown with maybe a minute left in the game and no timeouts. And that's assuming that you don't manage to get a single yard with your three running plays.

Foles - with the decision apparently left in his hands - threw a pass. The result can be seen in the video below:

Washington then went for two, and won 36-33.

Granted, the odds of that kind of play happening are pretty slim, but that's why you keep the ball on the ground.

Unless you're a bonehead.

Leave Tebow's Brain Alone

2009-10-09T15:50:00.012-04:00

I was a sports writer once. It's been years now.

I quit because I discovered that sports writers are only slightly above sand spurs and love bugs on the list of Things That Exist Just to Annnoy Us.

I know I'm stereotyping, but most of them should spend eternity in some dreadful place where they are forced to report exclusively on synchronized swimming.

Ever since Tim Tebow sustained a concussion in Florida's win at Kentucky on September 26, there has been nothing but conjecture and speculation on sports pages and websites across the nation.

If only I had a nickel for every time I've seen the word "if" used in one of these stories.

While one may exist somewhere, I've yet to run into a sports columnist who is also a neurologist. But you wouldn't know that by reading the pages and pages of unqualified opinions I've seen.

Today, on ESPN.com, Pat Forde has a piece called "Risk Not Worth the Reward for Florida." Really? How do you know what the risk is? Are you actually Tim Tebow masquerading as a sports reporter? No? Oh, so you must be his doctor then. I see.

CNN-SI.com has an article called "Tebow: To Play or Not to Play?" Wow. Is that clever or what? I read the whole thing, and, I must say, I got much more pleasure, and about the same amount of useful information, from their Cheerleader of the Week feature.

My favorite articles are the ones like this from CBS Sports.com entitled "Still No Word on Tebow's Status for LSU." In other words, they've written an entire news article about the fact that there is no news they can report.

According to the Gainesville Sun, even Gainesville Mayor Pegeen Hanrahan has chimed in, apparently saying, "“Real Gators want to be sure Tim Tebow is ready before they put him back in. This is a great opportunity for Brantley to show his skills!” in a recent Tweet.

Here is the thing that really gets me. All of these people have opinions to offer, and yet none of them really know anything.

They don't have access to the only information that would truly be useful in this situation. They've seen no reports from Tebow's MRI's and brain scans. They don't know Tebow's baseline scores on ImPACT (Immediate Post-Concussion Assessment and Cognitive Testing), SAC (Standard Assessment of Concussion), BESS (Balance Error Scoring System) and PCSS (Post Concussion System Scale), let alone his post-concussion scores.

They don't know what symptoms Tebow had, or for how long. They don't know what discussions have taken place between Tebow and his parents, his doctors, his coaches, or his teammates.

That is as it should be. This is a decision that should be left up to the people who do know.

Hats off to Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops who has been dealing with some of this same stuff regarding QB Sam Bradford's shoulder injury. Last week, a TV reporter asked what reaction Bradford had when he was told he wouldn't be playing against Miami. Stoops was mildly incredulous in response to the question, and said, "He wasn't told about the decision. He was involved in it."

I am confident that the people who are actually involved in this decision will do what they think is best for Tim Tebow. What sportswriters and the rest of us think is totally and completely irrelevant.

So leave Tebow's brain alone, and focus on the sports stories we really want. Like this gem from ESPN.com, "Golfer Loses Arm in Gator Attack."

If that doesn't win a Pulitzer Prize, what will?

My Crystal Ball Says...

2009-10-08T13:03:00.010-04:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

#21 Nebraska at #24 Missouri - This is a game between two teams that probably don't belong in the Top 25. Missouri started the season 4-0, and allegedly established some credibility with their pounding of Illinois in week 1. But it's becoming apparent that the Fighting Zookers stink. Nebraska took Virginia Tech down to the wire, but serious defensive lapses at the end cost them the game. Now in his second year, coach Bo Pelini has yet to see his Huskers beat a ranked team, but I think they will scrape by in this one.

#3 Alabama at #20 Mississippi - So far this season, Mississippi has been a disappointment, while Alabama has exceeded expectations. The Rebel defense has played pretty well, but the offense has been average, and QB Jevan Snead hasn't lived up to the pre-season hype. If you watched Alabama against Kentucky last week, they didn't look like world beaters. Until Kentucky helped them with four turnovers. Ole Miss will need a nearly perfect game at home to win. Avoid turnovers, penalties, and other mistakes. This game is HUGE for the Rebels. I think they find a way to win.

#1 Florida at #4 LSU - Am I the only person in the country that thinks LSU coach Les Miles is a dunderhead? He won a national championship two years ago because of superior talent and reckless gambling that seemed to pay off every time (going 5 for 5 on 4th downs against Florida, for example). The Tigers still have great athletes but their offense seems to sputter and their defense isn't exactly dominant (currently 40th in total defense). With all the focus on Tebow's skull this week, people seem to have forgotten that the Gators have other very capable ball carriers, a talented backup QB in John Brantley, and, oh, by the way, the nation's best defense. The Gators will win this one. Without Tebow. And it won't be close.

Wisconsin at #9 Ohio State - All week I've been reading that Wisconsin is "back" because they have their running game going like days of old, because QB Scott Tolzien is for real, blah, blah, blah. Let's get this straight right now (sorry, Bart!), the Badgers are 5-0 because they've played Northern Illinois, Fresno State, Wofford, Michigan State and Minnesota. Now they get to visit Ohio State. I hate Ohio State, but it looks like the Big Ten race will be decided on November 14th when Iowa visits Columbus. By the end of that day, Wisconsin will have 3 losses - counting this one to the Buckeyes.

Michigan at #12 Iowa - Remember Michigan? This is another team that everyone said was "back" after they beat Notre Dame. Come on. Beating Notre Dame is hardly even worth celebrating any more. I'm so tired of hearing about Tate Forcier... Let's see how good he is when he faces an actual defense, like, say, Iowa. The Hawkeyes are a bit hard to figure out. They struggle at home with the likes of Northern Iowa and Arkansas State, and then go on the road and manhandle Penn State. There's nothing flashy about them at all. They seem to play to the level of their opponents. So, if, indeed, Michigan is any good, Iowa will be better on Saturday.

Countdown to the Big Game

2009-10-06T00:02:00.002-04:00

Upon Further Review (Week 5)

2009-10-05T21:14:00.030-04:00

Stand Still Bobby While I Get That Knife Out of Your Back

I can't believe I'm doing this, but I need to talk to all the Nolies out there about Bobby Bowden. From years of experience, I already know that many of you are idiots, so I don't know why I should suddenly be surprised by the depth and breadth of your idiocy.

But I am.

Pay attention here, Nolies, because I am about to teach you something. It's not like those fake online classes you took, and you can't have somebody else learn it for you.

Florida State began playing football in 1947, not long after its transformation from an all-girls school to co-ed. Between 1947 and 1975, they won 150 games. From 1976 until now, they've won 311 games.

What happened in 1976? You hired Robert Cleckler Bowden to be your head football coach.

Bowden has the distinction of being the only coach in Division I-A (FBS) history to have 10 or more wins in 14 consecutive seasons. The Seminoles finished in the top 5 in the AP poll for 14 consecutive seasons. Since they joined the Atlantic Coast Conference in 1991, they have won the league title 12 times. And, of course, there are those two national championships, in 1993 and 1999.

The man has literally forgotten more about football than most of you have ever known.

So, Seminole fans, let me explain this in terms that even you can understand. Bobby Bowden is the only reason your program has even gotten to the level where you now feel you have the right to grumble about a couple of mediocre seasons.

I'm sure it's aggravating to watch your team lose games you have become accustomed to winning, or look bad even in victory. But all the whining coming out of Tallahassee now merely serves to reinforce the impression that you lack a basic sense of class.

Bobby Bowden gave you a football program that was worth watching, when you actually bothered to show up, and now you want to unceremoniously shove him out the door. Unbelievable.

I never liked Bowden. I think he has often been a poor disciplinarian, and, as recent events have shown, academic integrity at FSU has sometimes been sacrificed in the name of athletic achievement.

But I believe Bowden, like Joe Paterno, deserves to be able to coach as long as he wants. He has earned it.

You were willing to sit back and gloat during the decade and a half that your Seminoles dominated college football like no other team ever has. Let Bowden enjoy the twilight of his coaching career as much as you enjoyed its prime.

My Crystal Ball Says...

2009-10-01T21:31:00.031-04:00

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.

#7 USC at #24 California - Listen carefully. Do you hear that sound? It's the sound of both of these teams still choking. Cal got destroyed 42-3 at Oregon last week, with star running back Jahvid Best managing just 55 yards on 16 carries. Meanwhile USC stumbled through a 27-6 win over Washington State after an embarrassing loss to Washington the previous week. I don't care what anybody says, USC just doesn't have the kind of talent they've had in the recent past. On top of that, QB Matt Barkley has been banged up, and then RB Stafon Johnson had a strange and very nearly tragic weightlifting accident. Cal, on the other hand, faced high expectations like this once before. In 2007, they started the season 5-0, and were on the verge of claiming the top spot in the polls, but, thanks to then-freshman QB Kevin Riley's failure to pass the ball or run out of bounds while trailing with no time outs (he ran up the middle and got stuffed), they missed an opportunity to kick a last-second game-tying field goal in a 31-28 loss to Oregon State. From there, they collapsed, going 1-6 down the stretch before winning their bowl game. Will history repeat itself? The Golden Bears are at home, and badly in need of redemption after last week's mauling, but I'll take USC.

#22 Michigan at Michigan State - Even though Michigan State is 1-3, they've been scoring points - 27, 30 and 30, respectively, in their 3 losses. The problem is their defense isn't very good. Michigan's defense isn't very good either (they are 89th in total defense). While they are 4-0, they've had the benefit of playing those first 4 games at home. Now, they have to hit the road. Michigan has won the last three times in East Lansing, but lost to the Spartans at home last year (then again, who didn't beat Michigan last year?). So who will win? I have no idea. but I'm so tired of hearing about Michigan QB Tate Forcier that I will be rooting for Michigan State (even though I hate them). Forcier is bound to play like a freshman one of these days. I think it will be Saturday.

#4 LSU at #18 Georgia - This is a tough game to call. Both teams have been sometimes shaky on offense and often disappointing on defense. LSU is clearly over-ranked, but they are 4-0. Georgia has been schizophrenic - scoring a combined 93 points in their two games against SEC opponents, and 37 points in their two non-conference games. LSU has two receivers that will tower over the Georgia secondary (Brandon LaFell at 6-3 and Terrance Toliver at 6-5). If QB Jordan Jefferson has a good day getting the ball to them, the Dawgs won't be able to keep up. Since 2001, Georgia is 20-5 against teams from the SEC West, but something tells me that LSU will pull this one off.

#8 Oklahoma at #17 Miami - Last week, Miami, for the first time this season, ran into a team with a living, breathing defense. The result was a 31-7 shellacking at the hands of Virginia Tech. Oklahoma, at least in theory, has a much better defense than the Hokies. They are #1 in scoring defense and #1 against the run. In their upset loss to BYU, they gave up just 14 points. In the two games since then, they have given up none. Even without Heisman Trophy-winning QB Sam Bradford, the Sooners are formidable. Once he got past the BYU loss, back-up QB Landry Jones has performed well. Miami QB Jacory Harris was fun to watch in their first two games. Last week, against the Hokies, he stunk, completing just 9 of 25 passes for 150 yards. I think the Oklahoma defense will be too much for the 'Canes to handle.

Texas A&M vs Arkansas (at Arlington, TX) - Neither of these teams is ranked, but this promises to be a very entertaining game. Arkansas is 4th in the nation in passing offense. Texas A&M is tops in total offense (#6 passing, #7 rushing). Add to this the fact that neither defense is particularly good, and you have the makings of fast-paced shootout. On paper, the Aggie offense is fairly balanced, while the Hogs live by the pass, and have a running attack that is only slightly more effective than having me carry the ball. If you listen to ESPN's Mark May, you would think Arkansas QB Ryan Mallett is the greatest thing since the invention of the forward pass. The fact is his team is 1-2, and about to be 1-3. When in doubt, go with the team that runs the ball better. In this case, it's clearly Texas A&M.

Moments in College Football History

2009-09-30T10:09:00.004-04:00

First Down. Send in the Punter.

Have you ever sat through a low-scoring college football game, a defensive struggle with both teams slugging away, unable to gain a clear advantage? Sometimes they are amazing to watch. Defenses dominate, and field position is of primary importance. Tension builds as the game goes on, and the significance of every offensive play is magnified. A field goal can be huge. A touchdown monumental.

For a number of years, beginning in the 80's, Alabama and Penn State played each other regularly. In some of those games there were scoring outbursts, but often the results were like this: 1984, Alabama 6-0. 1988, Alabama 8-3. 1990, Penn State 9-0.

For some reason, I was thinking about those kinds of games the other day, and I wondered... How many punts had there ever been in one game? What's the NCAA record? Want to guess?

Go ahead, guess. I'll wait.

Give up?

Texas Tech in the 1939 Cotton Bowl

On November 11, 1939, Texas Tech met Centenary in Shreveport, Louisiana (Centenary College no longer fields a football team, but their nickname is the Gentlemen or Gents). The game was played in a heavy downpour, and neither team wanted the ball.

To this day, Charlie Calhoun from Texas Tech holds the individual record for most punts in a game. In that one game, he punted 36 times. And 33 of them were on first down!

The two teams combined for 77 punts.

Not surprisingly, the game ended in a scoreless tie.