Thursday, November 5, 2009

My Crystal Ball Says...

...that I know what will happen in this week's key games. Always remember that I'm right, and your team sucks.


Florida State at Clemson - For last week's Homecoming game against NC State, 13,000 Florida State (4-4) fans showed their loyalty by coming to the game disguised as empty seats - their worst home crowd since 1993 - when, oh, by the way, they won a national championship. I can say it here because it's my blog. They are the worst fans ever. Ever. And it turned out to be an exciting game that illustrated what's wrong with FSU this year. They beat the Wolfpack 45-42, thus showing that they can score points in droves, but have a hard time stopping other teams from scoring. QB Christian Ponder has quietly become the 5th ranked passer in the nation in terms of completions per game. It's been hard to notice when their defense is ranked 109th. Meanwhile, Clemson (5-3) running back CJ Spiller has emerged as a Heisman Trophy candidate by doing everything except filling the Gatorade coolers. So, you might wonder how Florida State can beat Clemson in Death Valley. The answer is simple. They can't.

#16 Ohio State at #11 Penn State - This game is kind of flying under the radar now that each and every one of the three people who still think the Big Ten is a good football league is hot to trot for Iowa - the one team that hasn't lost a game, even though they keep trying. There are rumblings from the fans in Columbus that the coaching staff hasn't used their talent wisely, and hasn't developed the abilities of QB Terrelle Pryor. Despite the fact that Ohio State (7-2) hasn't beaten anybody good, they are still ranked 16th for some unknown reason, and can still win the Big Ten if they beat Penn State (8-1), and win the rest of their games. Uh huh. Right. Penn State is having a normal Joe Paterno kind of year. There is nothing at all flashy about them, but they pile up wins like I pile up laundry in my closet. Daryll Clark is a solid performer at quarterback, and their running game, led by Evan Royster, is productive. Still, I think you can argue that the Nittany Lions haven't beaten anybody good either. Iowa (if you want to say they are good) came to town and dominated every aspect of the game in a 21-10 win that wasn't that close. Paterno, unlike his counterpart at Ohio State, is clearly a coach who uses his talent wisely. I would say that a Penn State win means the Sweatervest Juggernaut stops here, but, in reality, it stopped a while ago.

#8 Oregon at Stanford - This has all the makings of a "trap" game for Oregon (7-1), doesn't it? They're coming off a 27 point thrashing of USC, and they've been on such a roll that it's tough to believe they can keep it going. Stanford, on the other hand, is 4-3, but all three losses have come on the road. And they've had a bye week to prepare. Oregon's option attack with Jeremiah Masoli and LaMichael James is potent. But Stanford has an old-school, physical ground game, and tailback Toby Gerhart is 7th in the nation in rushing. I don't know why, but I'm feeling the upset. Fear the Tree. Or the Cardinal.

#9 LSU at #3 Alabama - In three of the last four years, this game has pretty much decided which team won the SEC West. And these games have been the kind of tension-filled slugfests that make even the calmest of fans chew their fingernails to the bone. Last year, Alabama (8-0) won in overtime in Baton Rouge, 27-21. But LSU (7-1) has won in each of their last four visits to Tuscaloosa. In 2007, LSU scored with a minute and a half left to win 41-34. In 2005, LSU won 16-13 in overtime. The Tigers struggled offensively and defensively early in the year, but are improving on both sides of the ball. Alabama's defense is still a dominating force, but their offense lately has been more about field goals than touchdowns. Opposing teams know they can gang up on tailback Mark Ingram, and dare the Tide to win with QB Greg McElroy's arm. But I think Alabama's strong offensive line will give them an advantage over the LSU front seven, and the Tigers' nearly non-existent pass rush - they are last in the league in sacks - may disappear entirely. If LSU quarterback Jordan Jefferson does a great job getting the ball to his big receivers, this game could be another classic. But I like Nick Saban's chances of guiding Alabama to a home win with defense, field position, a solid ground game, and some efficient passing from McElroy.

Vanderbilt at #1 Florida - Head coach Bobby Johnson has done about as good a job as you can do when you're the football coach at Vanderbilt (2-7). Last year, he took them to a bowl game for the first time since Ronald Reagan was president. And we're talking the first term here. But this year, the Commodores' ship is taking on water. They managed to beat Western Carolina and Rice - two teams who have combined to amass one win this year. All week long, Gator haters and SEC critics everywhere have been making eye-gouging jokes. Funny, huh? Brandon Spikes suspended himself for the second half of this game after his coach suspended him for the first half. You know what? It won't matter. Spikes will still be a first round draft pick, and the Gators (8-0) will gouge the eyes (figuratively speaking) of the Commodores. Florida has won 18 straight against Vanderbilt. If last week's game against Georgia really did wake the Gator offense from its slumber, the rest of the nation should be afraid. Very afraid.

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