Upon Further Review (Week 5)

Stand Still Bobby While I Get That Knife Out of Your Back

I can't believe I'm doing this, but I need to talk to all the Nolies out there about Bobby Bowden. From years of experience, I already know that many of you are idiots, so I don't know why I should suddenly be surprised by the depth and breadth of your idiocy.

But I am.

Pay attention here, Nolies, because I am about to teach you something. It's not like those fake online classes you took, and you can't have somebody else learn it for you.

Florida State began playing football in 1947, not long after its transformation from an all-girls school to co-ed. Between 1947 and 1975, they won 150 games. From 1976 until now, they've won 311 games.

What happened in 1976? You hired Robert Cleckler Bowden to be your head football coach.

Bowden has the distinction of being the only coach in Division I-A (FBS) history to have 10 or more wins in 14 consecutive seasons. The Seminoles finished in the top 5 in the AP poll for 14 consecutive seasons. Since they joined the Atlantic Coast Conference in 1991, they have won the league title 12 times. And, of course, there are those two national championships, in 1993 and 1999.

The man has literally forgotten more about football than most of you have ever known.

So, Seminole fans, let me explain this in terms that even you can understand. Bobby Bowden is the only reason your program has even gotten to the level where you now feel you have the right to grumble about a couple of mediocre seasons.

I'm sure it's aggravating to watch your team lose games you have become accustomed to winning, or look bad even in victory. But all the whining coming out of Tallahassee now merely serves to reinforce the impression that you lack a basic sense of class.

Bobby Bowden gave you a football program that was worth watching, when you actually bothered to show up, and now you want to unceremoniously shove him out the door. Unbelievable.

I never liked Bowden. I think he has often been a poor disciplinarian, and, as recent events have shown, academic integrity at FSU has sometimes been sacrificed in the name of athletic achievement.

But I believe Bowden, like Joe Paterno, deserves to be able to coach as long as he wants. He has earned it.

You were willing to sit back and gloat during the decade and a half that your Seminoles dominated college football like no other team ever has. Let Bowden enjoy the twilight of his coaching career as much as you enjoyed its prime.